Fan Fiction
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Just The Girl 2.0 – Chapter Eighteen (Based loosely on HYD: Returns)
“So TK, I see you’ve been keeping your boss in line, huh?” Sam smiled, gesturing towards Bette’s eye.
Like before, Tina just nodded.
Bette frowned. What was wrong with her? She wondered. Tina looked so red and constipated. “Are you okay?”
Nod.
“Are you sick?” Sam seconded.
Shake head.
“What’s wrong with you?” Bette followed up.
Tina looked up at the ceiling, sniffled, blinked a couple of times.. and then.. “Huuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!” She exhaled, finally allowed herself to breathe. The moment she stopped holding in her breath, one of the middle buttons on her uniform popped and flew into one of the coffee cups.
Bette and Sam blinked.
“Shit..” Bette looked at the button floating in her coffee in utter awe. “Holy fuck baby, how much weight did you gain?”
Tina sighed.
Pop! There goes another button.
“A lot.”
——————
DAY FOUR.
Porter Estate, Weschester County NY
“Feed me.”
“What?”
“I said, feed me.”
“You’ve got hands.”
“So? I also have a waiting mouth and a hungry stomach. Feed me.”
“I just brought you your food. Carried it up three flights of stairs and everything.”
“Because you need the exercise, chubby. Besides, that’s part of the service. Now shut up and feed me.”
“Why should I?”
“Cause I said so.”
“You want me to spoon-feed you like a baby?”
“Yes.”
“Have you no shame?”
“Shame is for losers. Us Porters have thick skin.”
“Which complements your thick skull.”
“Goes well with your thick frame.”
Pout. “Hmph.. feed yourself.”
“It’s not a request Kennard, I’m ordering you. Just because you want to lose weight doesn’t mean you have to starve me too. I mean, look at me..” Motions to her body. “I’m practically skin and bones.”
Siiiiiiiigh. “Fine.”
…
…
…
“Uh, Kennard.. what are you doing?”
“Feeding you.”
“With a spoon?”
“What else would I feed you with?”
“Your hands?”
“You’re kidding me..”
“Am I laughing?”
“No..”
“So, what are you waiting for? Feed me already.”
“You want me to feed you shrimps with my hands?”
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thanks alchemy! happy birthday and i hope you had a great celebration. your dialogue is just the best and looking forward to the next update.
this installment had me literally wheezing with laughter! so many one-liners i had to read again, they were just so good. so funny and sweet, our two stubborn soulmates – the maid scenario was a tricky proposition and you pulled it off brilliantly :-) this story is one of a kind. belated birthday wishes alchemy – i hope it was a great one – and i can’t wait for the next post
You did it again alch. I wish I can do what you do. Hilarious! Need to get rid of shawty and red, something tells me they’ll be showing in the Hamptons. Awesom are you. I’m not worth, I’m not worthy! Happy B-day!
This was the first I have read of your story. I read this whole post in one sitting. I will have to go back and read all the other post. Nothing else is going to being getting done around here until I’m caught up. :)This was crazy fun in places. Bette is so mean and sarcastic but this has been a fun read. Thanks for the post.
Love it as usual. Thanks and PPS!
I’ m very happy that you didn’ t write for a while for good things. Happy birthday Alchemy (although I’ m belated)! I hope you had a great time and a lot of drinks! As for the story, another perfect chapter as always. Thank you very much for that story. I have said it before and I will say it again: It’ s my favourite. Thank you girl. I can’ t wait for the next one. Many kisses.
thanks for the update.just loved it it.keep up the good work.pps
Happy B’day Alchy!!! May you have a wonderful upcoming year – and thank you for your gift of writing for us. First…LOL!Secondly…ROFL!Thirdly…ROFLMAO!!!!!I love fun-Alchy! (yes…I know…you had to do the drama…but you are the Mt. Everest-of-fanfic humor!” I laughed so hard…my dog started to bark with all the excitement and joy! You are simply C-O-N-T-A-G-I-O-U-S-L-Y F-U-N!!!!!! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! *btw…what a tease with the ‘almost kiss.’ :)I love Tina when she’s all “weed-like.” Brings out the flirt in Bette. So sweet! PPS!
Happy Birthday Alchemy, wishing you all the best my friend. OMG that was so freaking funny and sweet, B&T are killing us here with their stbborn and crazy way there lol. Please post more, thanks!
Oh I haven’t laughed that hard in quite a while. Alchemy that was just an amazing chapter, all of it. There are so many examples of your unique humor from Bette’s admission of her love for Tina to Tina’s drooling conversation with Bette concerning her breath. Awesome. Thanks for posting I loved the read.
Hey Alchemy. Happy Birthday! Hope it was a great one. This is a wonderful story and funny too! I can’t wait for your next post.
This was a fun update! PPS
I love this story. How does Bette have anyone working for her? She is so mean. Good thing Tina really does love her and vice versa.
Thank you for the update. This is my favorite story and I was getting worried that you would stop posting. Thanks
What can I say, I am in awe of your writing. I absolutley love this story!
It took me 6 days to have the courage to read this Alch, I couldn’t bear to see them hurting each other that much. Then I wanted to see at what level you were so I finally read it. I am so glad I’ve done it BECAUSE I love it almost back to what I love about your story: LOVE and CARE. Thank you, thank you, thank you and a late HAPPY BIRTHDAY
And funny funny funny. It just like I like it woowoo. It was funny even if they are not back back together yet thy=ey are togethr right??? It was great.
Happy Belated Birthday, Alch! I feel like I’m the one getting the present with this chapter. Your humor is exceptional…had me laughing like a loon the whole way through. Too many good parts to mention starting with Bette’s horrific morning breath to Tina’s asphyxiatingly tight new uniform. Just brilliant!!
HBD Alch! Thanks for a great update! You were worrying me there for a bit. Hilarious chapter BTW.
what a happy day when i see a new post from you, luved it as usual!!
It took me a while but I finally read every chapter of this story. Great story. I can’t wait for the next installment.