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    Just The Girl 2.0 – Chapter Eighteen (Based loosely on HYD: Returns)

     

    “You can use mine.” Bette continued, her tone still oddly indifferent. She looked at James and passed a silent order to the man. He got the message and made a mental note to reserve his boss’s chopper for Tina from now on. Bette looked back at her chambermaid, who was still rooted at the same spot. “What are you waiting for? Take your place.” She inclined her head at the line-up.

     

    “Yes, ma’am.”

     

    With everything all set and in order, Bette began.

     

    “Good evening, lowly servants.”

     

    “Good evening Miss Bette!” The maids chorused.

     

    “I’m sure all of you are wondering what the purpose of this assembly is. It’s fairly simple,” Bette smiled, her tone full of authority. “It has come to my attention that some of the things in this estate are old-fashioned and grossly outdated. I have already sent out orders to the maintenance staff to rid my home of those oddities; but mind you, its not only restricted to material things. I’m also talking about the estate’s hired help.” She motioned to the maids before her. “Looking at each and every one of you, I can’t help but feel like crying pools of blood. You ladies, with your ruffly blouses, gaudy aprons and funny headbands are a bunch of eyesores. And I really can’t take this visual torture anymore. It’s time for someone to take action, and I did.” She folded her arms and puffed out her chest, trying to look like the great dictator that she was. “What a servant does, the way the carry themselves and their appearance reflect on their masters. So from now on,” Bette snapped a finger. James opened one of the doors and in came Raoul, her personal shopper of seven years, with a rack full of designer-made uniforms. Bette took one out from the rack and showed it to everyone. It was still in your standard maid’s black-and-white colors, only this time, it had a plunging neckline, a short skirt, a revealing slit and it looked pretty tight. And by tight, it’s the one-deep-breath-and-the-buttons-would-pop-out kind of tight. “My dear friend Valentino was kind enough to design something for the entire household. From now on, all maids will wear this..” Bette proclaimed. “Except you.” She quickly amended and pointed at Sophia. “You’re fat.”

    Comments

    1. this installment had me literally wheezing with laughter! so many one-liners i had to read again, they were just so good. so funny and sweet, our two stubborn soulmates – the maid scenario was a tricky proposition and you pulled it off brilliantly :-) this story is one of a kind. belated birthday wishes alchemy – i hope it was a great one – and i can’t wait for the next post

    2. You did it again alch. I wish I can do what you do. Hilarious! Need to get rid of shawty and red, something tells me they’ll be showing in the Hamptons. Awesom are you. I’m not worth, I’m not worthy! Happy B-day!

    3. This was the first I have read of your story. I read this whole post in one sitting. I will have to go back and read all the other post. Nothing else is going to being getting done around here until I’m caught up. :)This was crazy fun in places. Bette is so mean and sarcastic but this has been a fun read. Thanks for the post.

    4. I’ m very happy that you didn’ t write for a while for good things. Happy birthday Alchemy (although I’ m belated)! I hope you had a great time and a lot of drinks! As for the story, another perfect chapter as always. Thank you very much for that story. I have said it before and I will say it again: It’ s my favourite. Thank you girl. I can’ t wait for the next one. Many kisses.

    5. Happy B’day Alchy!!! May you have a wonderful upcoming year – and thank you for your gift of writing for us. First…LOL!Secondly…ROFL!Thirdly…ROFLMAO!!!!!I love fun-Alchy! (yes…I know…you had to do the drama…but you are the Mt. Everest-of-fanfic humor!” I laughed so hard…my dog started to bark with all the excitement and joy! You are simply C-O-N-T-A-G-I-O-U-S-L-Y F-U-N!!!!!! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! *btw…what a tease with the ‘almost kiss.’ :)I love Tina when she’s all “weed-like.” Brings out the flirt in Bette. So sweet! PPS!

    6. Happy Birthday Alchemy, wishing you all the best my friend. OMG that was so freaking funny and sweet, B&T are killing us here with their stbborn and crazy way there lol. Please post more, thanks!

    7. Oh I haven’t laughed that hard in quite a while. Alchemy that was just an amazing chapter, all of it. There are so many examples of your unique humor from Bette’s admission of her love for Tina to Tina’s drooling conversation with Bette concerning her breath. Awesome. Thanks for posting I loved the read.

    8. It took me 6 days to have the courage to read this Alch, I couldn’t bear to see them hurting each other that much. Then I wanted to see at what level you were so I finally read it. I am so glad I’ve done it BECAUSE I love it almost back to what I love about your story: LOVE and CARE. Thank you, thank you, thank you and a late HAPPY BIRTHDAY

    9. And funny funny funny. It just like I like it woowoo. It was funny even if they are not back back together yet thy=ey are togethr right??? It was great.

    10. Happy Belated Birthday, Alch! I feel like I’m the one getting the present with this chapter. Your humor is exceptional…had me laughing like a loon the whole way through. Too many good parts to mention starting with Bette’s horrific morning breath to Tina’s asphyxiatingly tight new uniform. Just brilliant!!

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