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Project New Girl – (Chapter: Dazed and Confused)
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My mind went back to the note she had written, and its similarities to the one I’d forced Carrie to write. The similarities no longer surprised me. I understood. Her hand was forced, and there was nothing she felt she could have done… still, it doesn’t excuse what she did to me.
“It was all just so fucked up – all of it,” she said, “and yet there you were, so peacefully unaware as you slept, looking so gorgeous… I didn’t want to wake you up; I didn’t want to disturb your life any more than I already had. So I left. I figured: “break it off now before she gets too attached” -”
“But I was already attached,” I interrupted, in complete disbelief at how blind she had been towards how I’d felt about her. She was totally clueless! “You just don’t get it, did you?”
“Get what?” she asked, sounding exhausted.
“I was already completely in love with you,” I told her. “I couldn’t have given a fuck what anyone thought so long as I was with you.”
She was silent for a moment, looking so conflicted it took all the power I had to not reach out and touch her.
“Well, that was how we were different,” she surmised, “and why we would have never worked.”
“Not back then, no,” I reasoned, “but how about now?”
“What?” she murmured, her tear-filled eyes looking up to search for meaning in my own.
“Us? Now?” I asked. “Grown up, unattached, and no longer reliant on the thoughts and opinions of others for validation.”
She paused for a moment, noticing the change in my tone. I noticed it too, and realised I’d forgiven her. In a short moment I’d gone from being totally confused and enraged by her actions, to completely understanding her motives and forgiving her for them. I’d put myself on the line without even giving it a second thought. I was suggesting that fresh start that I’d wanted all along, only that I’d never been able to forget the past for long enough to let happen.
“Very eloquent,” she smiled through her tears.
“Don’t joke around, I’m serious,” I said, unable to help the smile that was creeping up on me. “The truth is I never got over you… sure, I might have put my feelings on hold and told myself that I didn’t care any more… but they were all still there, bubbling away under the surface, ready to explode as soon as you walked back into my life.”
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were you reading my mind? because last night i was like…ok damn i really could use an update of png! and what an update it was!! so much stuff cleared up!! but theres still that tiny matter of that bet…hmm no big right? lol WRONG! prepare for fallout. remember everyone DUCK AND COVER! i’m so excited for the next chappy!
basically i agree with what everyone has said so far. and i cant wait until the next chapter. *dances* yay spenceandash. and if aiden screws this up ill castrate him, not really thats just my threat :]
o how i have been waiting for this update! and well worth it, cant wait to see how this week goes
Dam that was very good I hope Ashley can make it a week cause if not she is screwed and not in the way we all want
woah baby! wow. amazing chapter! i can’t wait until you post the next one! i have this strange feeling that ashley and spencer aren’t going to make it the rest of the week…not with that exchange in words! I guess i’ll have to wait to find out!
were you reading my mind? because last night i was like…ok damn i really could use an update of png! and what an update it was!! so much stuff cleared up!! but theres still that tiny matter of that bet…hmm no big right? lol WRONG! prepare for fallout. remember everyone DUCK AND COVER! i’m so excited for the next chappy!
basically i agree with what everyone has said so far. and i cant wait until the next chapter. *dances* yay spenceandash. and if aiden screws this up ill castrate him, not really thats just my threat :]
o how i have been waiting for this update! and well worth it, cant wait to see how this week goes
Dam that was very good I hope Ashley can make it a week cause if not she is screwed and not in the way we all want
woah baby! wow. amazing chapter! i can’t wait until you post the next one! i have this strange feeling that ashley and spencer aren’t going to make it the rest of the week…not with that exchange in words! I guess i’ll have to wait to find out!
sweetttttttttttt tell her now ash cause it will kill her when she finds out
sweetttttttttttt tell her now ash cause it will kill her when she finds out
omg you’re making me all emotional and i was hanging on to each and every word in the mucho intense fight. it was unbelievably good!!! this reminds me so much of your earlier fic that i fell in love with. :D keep up the good work mate!!!!
omg you’re making me all emotional and i was hanging on to each and every word in the mucho intense fight. it was unbelievably good!!! this reminds me so much of your earlier fic that i fell in love with. :D keep up the good work mate!!!!
Holy COW! Great update man. GREAT. I loved it. And the emotion that was running thru this whole thing? Amazing. I was feeling everything that Ashley and Spencer were feeling. Thnk god that they are together, but now I’ve started to panic about when Spencer finds out about the bet. I wonder how it’s going to go down. I’ll be waiting for your next post. Hopefully Ashley will be able to wait a week. Love! xoXOxo
Holy COW! Great update man. GREAT. I loved it. And the emotion that was running thru this whole thing? Amazing. I was feeling everything that Ashley and Spencer were feeling. Thnk god that they are together, but now I’ve started to panic about when Spencer finds out about the bet. I wonder how it’s going to go down. I’ll be waiting for your next post. Hopefully Ashley will be able to wait a week. Love! xoXOxo