Fan Fiction
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Planet Terror: Love in the Time of DC-2
Kit Porter was arguing with her boyfriend—again.
“No, I do not have to make a commitment to you, just because the motherfuckin world has ended. Now you’re a young man and you…”
“stop telling me how young I am!” The man who shall forever more remain nameless for very ominous reasons, struggled to control the controls in his hands. The military issued chopper was too old, and too rickety to trust on this trip, let alone one that involved some haphazardly planned rescue mission. “They could be anywhere!” he shouted in frustration. “Anywhere Kit…you said they got lost on their way to Mexico, how the fuck does that happen? And besides, there’s a lot of land between Mexico and WHEREVER!”
“Hush, there she is!” Kit pointed, waving frantically to her baby sister who was currently in a small rowboat with Alice and Shane, sinking deeper into the ocean. “See? I knew we’d find her.” She shrugged, knowing that some things were just too mysterious to explain to the doubters among us.
Down below, Bette shielded her eyes, looking up.
“Bette?” Alice poked her. “Who do you think that is? Also, we’re sinking.”
“I don’t know who that is…omigod that’s KIT!” Bette’s voice rose as her realization sunk in. Above them now, the chopper caused the sea water to churn slightly. A rope was lowered and Kit’s face appeared above it.
“Shane, you and Alice go, I have to get this stuff.” Bette directed the other two to begin their climb, as she started grabbing at the bags that held the antidotes.
Bette couldn’t hide her glee at having been rescued like this. Their lives at this point, seemed almost charmed. Falling into her sister’s embrace, Bette knew that they would find the rest of their family soon.
“Woah!” The pilot continued to make ominous sounds like that, tilting the helicopter dangerously to the right. “Ok, ok, we’re fine. It’s just…Too many people I think…”
“Isn’t it big enough for all of us?” Bette’s tone held a note of panic. She had hoped that this rescue mission would end up holding a lot more people—namely Helena and Caiohme, Peggy and Lara.
The ominously unnamed pilot shook his head. “No. This thing will hold three people at most.”
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hb… I was laughing too hard to be worried about the teeming hordes of infected waiting for them all on shore. I almost feel bad for the “ominously unnamed pilot”, cos I’m sure he’s just zombie fodder. What of Kit though? And Jenny!! (I think she’ll be alright regardless. Maybe she can tame the one she was about to tussle with and come riding to the rescue of everyone with an army of Tiger Sharks…) This & the last chapter were great, and yay for reunions! Now, let them all kick some zombie…. arse! Thanks for the post + I want more… Cheers, hb
“…jesus Christ we’re fucking viciously fucked…” I’ll probably use that line in the very near future…it was very cute how Bette and Helena reunited…so precious…and Peggy’s full of surprises isn’t she…And Jenny, omg, i’m in stitches…kitties of the sea? is that a variation of chicken of the sea? whatever, it was funny as hell…pps
God HB, you make mayhem and horror such fun! Kit and nameless one (He better not be the Lord God Jehova, ultimate author of all things apocalyptic, or you’ll be sorry) surely made a fortuitous appearance. Yeah, I think Jenny can handle Sounder and the other kitties. How are her retinas? And will the helicopter blades clear an goodly area of bubbling zombies, mincing them as they melt? And Helena IS growing her leg back! Too bad she’s at that ackward stage.
I’m duly impressed by Peggy’s deft handling of the missile thingy and the awesome Belena reunion, but those scenes pale in comparison to Jenny vs. Bad Kitty. Thanks for making my dreams come true, HB! Is Jenny acting more insane than usual because she drank hallucination-inducing saltwater? In any event, bring on the main event! The tiger shark doesn’t stand a chance. Someone should alert Greenpeace.
oh dear, did i make jenny sound a bit like cartman from southpark? ‘that’s a BAD KITTY!’ oops. rufus, you KNOW it’s gonna have to be a draw:)
helebette, if it’s all the same to you, could you kindly not make me sound like a fic nazi or something? I am sorry if you feel like that.
Hello HB, you definitely deserve all the praise you get and more… no modesty from you… your that damn good. The reunion is finally here, Bette and Kit’s and then we get the gang all together again, this is so much fun and addictive. Keep em coming. Sincerely, JC