Im an old man.  So hard for behavior modification or new age thinking at my age.  I love both my girls – funny, Ill always call them girls.  Theyre grown women now.  And good women, too.  Katys had her demons but she really seems to be getting a handle on things now. Shes quite a talent and Im very proud of her – even though I dont say it to her.  And Elizabethwell, shes my baby. 

When I married her mother it wasnt the most popular time for a Black man to be marrying a white woman, but we loved one another and we really didnt care.  We werent what a large part of society accepted as normal.  We were just two people who loved each other.  What is so difficult to understand or accept about that?  

When Elizabeth came along we were in our glory and so happy.  She was a beautiful baby and grew into a beautiful, bright and talented woman.  But I was a foolish man and as I had done with Katys mother, I repeated with Elizabeths mother and me, once again, hurt someone I truly cared about.

When Elizabeth lashed out at me last week I thought back to how her mother and I felt when we became a couple and how so many people looked down on us and said it was wrong for black and white to mix and God forbid, how dare they bring a child into this world.   It mattered not that we were both educated, well-respected, caring and compassionate people.  They only saw us through their fear and ignorance.  When you look through those lenses your sight is always blurred.  The image you see is never a true one.  Fear and ignorance specifically distort the images of people.  If they dont look like people, then they cant have feelings or hearts or minds, and it makes it all right to hate them – after all, theyre not like us so its okay to spew hatred and prejudice towards them. 

I never could understand and its always been difficult for me to accept Elizabeths choices in romance.  It was against nature, against God; how could she think what she felt for another woman would be the same as what a woman and a man felt.  How could they think of bringing a child into this world in what clearly was not a normal relationship?  And just because the sperm came from a Black man, that made it my family?  My blood is not in that child.  How could it be family?

And then the light went on in this old mans head.  I had been viewing Elizabeth through the same lenses of fear and ignorance as those who treated her mother and I so horribly.  They are just two people who love one another and what is so difficult to understand about that, Melvin Porter? 

Do you remember what it was like to love someone and have them love you in return?  Did it matter what color they were, what religion they were?  Of course not, you loved them.  None of those things mattered, so why should gender, Melvin?  Isnt it time you accepted your child as a person who is capable of giving and accepting love selflessly and without hesitation in the face of fear and ignorance?  Isnt she doing exactly what you and her mother did?

Melvin Porter pushed up from his chair; made the noises that old folks do when they move in certain directions.  Yes, Im a bit slower now.  It takes me a lot longer to do things.  Thats why I better start packing now.  I want to be on time to meet my new granddaughter on Thursday

TBC