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Love Trumps Fear, Every Time – (Chapter: 5)
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“Because no matter how much I wanted to forget the pain, my love never left. It was my way of making it come true for her…for us…”
“Making what come true?”
“That …we would always be”, Paula softly said. Spencer’s heart dropped. She was so touched. It felt so much like the love she had for Ashley.
“So the anger…the hatred…the name calling..”
“When I figured out that you could be falling in love with Ashley, I hated it. I didn’t want you to ever have to deal with what I did. I wanted to do everything I could to keep you from that pain. I didn’t want Ashley to fall in love with you and risk you or her doing the same thing Spencer did one day. I didn’t know how else to stop it! But to try to push it away. I didn’t want it in my life again”
“But don’t you think that you were doing the same thing to me and Ashley that your parents and her parents did?”
“I don’t know. But, Spencer, that is still no excuse for what I saw today. You are only 16. You can’t just be running around having these wild sexual experiences”
“Mom, I am in love with her”
Paula knew those words were coming. She knew exactly what they meant, but a part of her still resisted. “Spencer you can’t…do this”
“Mom don’t change…go back to the understanding mom that was just here. Don’t be afraid anymore. Let me love her.”
“I’m sorry Spencer. I can’t! Do you know what it felt like as a mother to see your little girl naked and entangled the way that you were? It was horrifying.”
“Mom, how can you even say my name out loud and not understand what this is about? It‘s not like you haven‘t done this before.”
“Spencer, I am trying to protect you. No more Ashley please. No more. I know that this kind of pain is coming for you. It‘s inevitable. It‘s going to happen. I don‘t want that for you.”
Spencer stood up in shock that her mom was still trying to keep them apart, “Mom how can you say that after what we just shared. I was beginning to feel so much closer to you. I wanted to understand you. “
“Spencer, regardless of what was said, I am still your mother. I still have to look out for you… Spencer, come back, where are you going?”
“Mom…this really hurts. I am going to my room. I can’t deal with what you are saying to me now. And mom…one thing you should know….Ashley and I…we will always be.” She stormed upstairs.
Hearing those last words, Paula folded her arms, put her head down and continued to cry … alone.
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Wow that was very touching chapter. Had me in tears when paula was telling spencer about her and spencer. I cant belive after all what she told spencer she still doesnt want them together.PMS
Gosh, how can Paula be so touching and hypocritical at the same time…geez. You’d think she’d realize that she’s doing to Spencer what her parents did to her. By doing that she’s just pushing Spencer away…aiyah, parents…I don’t get them.
wow almost had me tears. this was amazing chapter, PMS
OMGGG. that was…. jus brillant. like im soo speechless, that was like one of the best chapters ive read.
Holy JESUS! How can Paula be such a jerk? Update so I can try to figure out why. Grr… she makes me so mad. PMS. xoxo Love.
Wow that was very touching chapter. Had me in tears when paula was telling spencer about her and spencer. I cant belive after all what she told spencer she still doesnt want them together.PMS
Gosh, how can Paula be so touching and hypocritical at the same time…geez. You’d think she’d realize that she’s doing to Spencer what her parents did to her. By doing that she’s just pushing Spencer away…aiyah, parents…I don’t get them.
wow almost had me tears. this was amazing chapter, PMS
OMGGG. that was…. jus brillant. like im soo speechless, that was like one of the best chapters ive read.
Holy JESUS! How can Paula be such a jerk? Update so I can try to figure out why. Grr… she makes me so mad. PMS. xoxo Love.
Wow great chapter! How can paula go from that intense understanding person back to her normal self in a split second? Update soon!
Wow great chapter! How can paula go from that intense understanding person back to her normal self in a split second? Update soon!
Oh holy…here I am sick balling over this chapter! I mean you brought tears to my eyes it was just so…and then at the end when she said that she and Ashley would always be. This was, that was…and you actually made me like Paula for a minute there! No ones ever made me like her if their fics…ugh and in a way I can understand why she’s doing what she’s doing. But then again she’s doing exactly what her parents did to her and look at what happened there! ARGH…you totally rule! Keep writing, and I’ll keep reading.
Oh holy…here I am sick balling over this chapter! I mean you brought tears to my eyes it was just so…and then at the end when she said that she and Ashley would always be. This was, that was…and you actually made me like Paula for a minute there! No ones ever made me like her if their fics…ugh and in a way I can understand why she’s doing what she’s doing. But then again she’s doing exactly what her parents did to her and look at what happened there! ARGH…you totally rule! Keep writing, and I’ll keep reading.