That was the worst night of my life.

I spent the night in jail wishing everything would just come back to me. I lost glen and Ashley, the looks they had in their eyes broke my heart into a million pieces. Worse part was that jen was dead. I was no longer my own killer, I was hers. I know I fucked up big time and I’m sure there was no way of fixing it.

I’m brought out of my thoughts by the sounds of my mother screaming

“Spencer! Spencer how could you! I thought you were smarter than this…you could have died!”

Like I don’t already know that? I really wish I was the one who died; at least jen could have made something of herself unlike me, who is pretty much on my way to prison soon.

“Mom…I know ok…I’m sorry…”

“Sorry! Spencer sorry doesn’t bring back the life of that girl!” She says halfway screaming chocking out each word in between sobs.

“Her name was Jen mom.” Its funny, she was here with me a few hours ago, now I’m talking like she doesn’t exist anymore, I guess she doesn’t

“You knew her? Not only did you kill someone but a friend? Spencer I don’t know what to say to get things through to you. All I can express to you right now is sadness and disappointment. You are not the little girl I raised…you turn out to be more and more like your father everyday.”

And that was it; those words were enough to send me back into my fits of crying. If anything could make me cry or feel like the biggest asshole in the world, it was my mom and glen comparing me to my father. Thinking about it hurt too much.

“Your hearing will be in a few days, I can’t bail you out. This is a lot more serious than anything you’ve ever done Spencer. I love you so much and I know somehow we will get through this but for now I have to go…seeing you like this brings back too many memories…”

“I get it mom…I love you too.” It felt like I was on my way to death row and I was never going to see my mom or glen, or Ashley again.