I hear a small thump on the counter, and I spin around to be greeted by a rough tongue licking the tip of my nose.

Meow.

“Oh, God damn you, Robby!” I yell as I pick the cat up by its neck. I stare her down and she just hangs there with her tail between her legs. My eyes soften and it’s just so pathetic looking. I feel bad, so I cradle her, instead.

I let out a small sigh as I go to walk back up the stairs to my room. “You scared the shit out of me, Robs.” Okay, so I’m talking to a cat…That’s not completely weird. Right?

“C’mon, you can sleep with me, tonight.” I set her down on my bed, and then get under the covers, myself. I get situated lying on my back and close my eyes.

I feel a pressure on my stomach, and I open my eyes to see Robby turning in circles and then lying down on my abs. I chuckle, lightly, and pet her one the head, receiving a purr. It’s a fucking king size bed, and she chooses to sleep on me. Sometimes I don’t know whether to hate this cat or love it to pieces.

-~-

“Wake up.” I hear a voice say, sternly. I know who it sounds like, but it can’t be. All the sudden, I feel something land on my face, and I sit up, opening my eyes.

“Mom?” I say tiredly, while rubbing my eyes.

“Yes, it’s me, Twit. Now get up, and start packing.” That makes sense. The thing she threw at me was my duffle.

“Uh, where are we going?” I ask as I throw my legs over the side of the bed.

She chuckles. Not a normal chuckle either. Like one of those evil chuckles that you hear a villain use in old Disney movies and whatnot. “We’re not going anywhere. You need to make yourself scarce.”

I narrow my eyes. “Why are you even home?” I snap. She could probably feel the venom dripping from my tone of voice. “Aren’t you supposed to be in San Francisco for God knows how long?”

“I was.” she says simply. “I invited Mike back home,” new man candy I’m guessing. “He doesn’t know that I have,” she gives me a once over, “you. So I need you out of here by five.” God, why did this woman even bother having me?