Carmen had been staying at her mom’s house for the past two days. Initially she had gone there because she wanted to talk to Julian, but she hadn’t been able to find the courage to confront him, and now she felt herself only avoiding him at all costs. Whenever he got home from his new summer job, she’d quickly disappear into her bedroom, busying herself with mixing songs together she already knew she’d never ever play at the Planet.
She looked over their backyard, shaking her head to all the toys which lay scattered around on the grass, no one bothering to clean them up. Their house was always crowded, and it was something she had grown attached to. Whenever her older brother’s and sister’s were visiting they would bring all their kids with them. In this house there was always noise, children’s voices and laughter. Their house wasn’t that big or luxurious, but it was light, comfortable and warm. But today it was quiet. Julian and her mother had both just left for work, Laura was staying at her boyfriend’s house and her other siblings all had houses of their own. Unable to stop any horror scenarios playing out in her head, she wondered what her life would be like if she’d lose her family. She shook her head, she wouldn’t be able to deal with it.
Her cell phone vibrated in her pocket, and it quickly put a stop to her dark thoughts. Hoping to see that it was Shane calling her, she couldn’t help but feel disappointed when the caller ID read ‘Laura’.
‘Hey Laura,’ she picked up.
’Hey, Carm listen, I was wondering, if you want to go shopping with me tomorrow,’ Laura said. Why waste time on irrelevant chitchat. 
‘Shopping.., why?’
‘I want to go look around for wedding dresses. You know, not that I have the money to buy anything yet. I just want to go by some stores, make the salesmen go nuts by trying everything on and not buying a single thing,’ her older sister rambled excitedly.
‘Whoa, whoa, calm down.. Are you saying that Jerry proposed to you?’
‘No.. not yet. But y’know, I feel like he’s going to.’
‘You feel like he’s going to..,’ Carmen repeated cynical.
‘Yes! Please Carmen, don’t start this protective bullshit all over again. I’m so not in the mood,’ Laura sighed dramatically.
‘Alright.. alright.. So he showed you a wedding ring yet?’
‘No.. But I found a mysterious little velvet box in his closet,’ Laura giggled.
‘Oh..hmm, lemme guess, one from a bubblegum machine?’
‘Funny. You know, I really don’t like you today. Is something wrong?’
‘No.. I’m fine,’ Carmen sighed, ‘I’m sorry.. It’s just that I wish he would get a decent job before deciding to marry you.’
‘Since when do you consider DJ-ing not to be a decent job?’ Laura asked.
‘He’s not a DJ, Laura. He is in charge of playing eighties rock at a strip club.’
‘Hey, nothing’s wrong with that!’ Laura protested.
Carmen rolled her eyes. ‘Whatever.. Okay, tomorrow,’ Carmen gave in, ‘Try on dresses. Yippie,’ she added dryly.
‘Yes! I knew you would do it. I love you!’
‘Say it!’
‘Oh god.. okay.. You’re the best sister in the world,’ Laura said dutifully.
‘Why thank you,’ Carmen smirked, ‘I needed that.’ Her words were truer than Laura knew.
‘Ok, I’ll see you tomorrow. I’ll come pick you up around two? Ok?’
‘Sure, bye.’
‘Bye!’
After she hung up she stepped away from the window and played with the cell phone in her hand. Flipping it open she silently pondered on calling Shane or not. It was the thing that had been bothering her the most these past two days while she was staying with her family. It wasn’t Julian, whom she was too scared to talk to or Laura, who was about to make the biggest mistake of her life. It wasn’t even her mother, whose suspicious stares made the back of her neck prickly with discomfort and made her hands feel clammy.
No, what had worried her the most was that Shane hadn’t contacted her in two days. At first she didn’t think any of it, she knew that Shane was busy working and she didn’t want to disturb her or even worse: come off as a clingy girlfriend. If there was one way to make Shane go running, that had to be it. So she waited, but she couldn’t help but feel worried and a little lonely, after coming home late from work last night without even finding a sweet text message waiting for her. No goodnight, no thinking-of-you’s, no I-love-you’s. She even began to feel ashamed for crying like a baby in Shane’s arms, the last night she was over at Shane’s. Putting away her pride she quickly dialed Shane’s number, before she’d have any second thoughts.

‘Hey,’ she heard Shane say, and muffling sounds of items being moved in the background.
‘Hey, it’s me,’ Carmen replied, slowly rolling a lock of her hair between her thumb and index finger.
‘I know,’ Shane said, and for a second Carmen could hear the smile in her voice.
‘What are you doing?’
‘Oh, I’m just.. wait a sec,’ Shane said absentmindedly. Carmen heard Shane walking around, and a closet being opened and closed again. She listened intently, pressing the phone closer to her ear.
‘I was just deciding on what to wear,’ Shane suddenly said, and Carmen jumped a little at the sudden sound echoing through her head. She switched the phone to her other ear and quickly recovered herself.
‘Oh, one of those days huh?’ Carmen said with a smirk on her face.
‘What days?’ Shane said, sounding cold.
‘Just.. never mind. Are you okay?’ Carmen asked worriedly.
Shane didn’t answer her question, instead she started walking around her bedroom again, folding different items of clothing.
Carmen sighed, feeling a dull pain in her heart grow. ‘You know what, you sound busy, so I guess I’ll just leave you alone. It’s pretty obvious that that is what you want from me.’
‘…’
‘Are you even paying attention to me?! I’m gonna hang up on you now!,’ Carmen warned.
‘No, Carmen!,’ Shane said quickly, ‘I’m sorry.. Yes, I’m busy, but I don’t want you to leave me alone.’
‘Oh,’ Carmen replied, her voice barely a whisper.
‘I mean it. Fuck, I must have sound like a total asshole.’
‘Maybe just a little,’ Carmen agreed, her eyes gleaming with an odd mix of sadness and amusement.
‘Listen, why don’t you come over. I miss you,’ Shane said sincerely.
‘Really?’ Carmen asked sounding incredulously, feeling a wave of relief wash over her. A wave of relief that she didn’t allow herself to feel that much.
‘Yes, of course. Get your sexy ass over here.’
‘Okay..,’ Carmen smiled, ‘I’ll be there in a hour.’
‘Alright.’
‘I can’t wait,’ Carmen quickly added. She allowed herself that much.
Shane chuckled, ‘Me neither, baby. Bye…’

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