Tina: God, Kit. I cant believe this is happening. That job meant the world to her and James said the Board wasnt even sure if she was coming back. This just keeps getting worse and worse.

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Kit: Tina, you should try and lie down. You need to get some rest. Its been a really long day and you and the baby need your rest.

Tina: I dont think I can sleep Kit, but I am tired. I think I will lay down for awhile.

Tina goes into the bedroom. She cant believe that this is the only room left in the house in which she can still smell Bettes presence. She goes over to the dresser in hopes that Bette left something that she can change into in an effort to feel closer to her. As she looks through Bettes things, she is surprised to see that not a lot is missing. Out of curiosity she goes over to Bettes closet. She is again surprised to find that it is full. No wonder she can still feel Bette, still sense her presence. Everything is still here. Then she remembers Bettes words from the video.

I am sorry to have left all my stuff there, but I am sure the girls will help you dispose of it anyway you see fit. I took what few things I needed, but I cannot bear the memories that come with the rest.

Tinas tears begin to flow again. She is heartbroken, not only for her own pain, but also for the pain that she knows Bette endured. She cannot believe that Bette left everything she did. Was it because she couldnt bear the memories or was it her way of detaching from their life together? She looked around taking an inventory of the pictures of her and Bette together, not a one was missing. They were all in the exact same places that they had always been. Could Bette really forget her that easily, forget the life they shared? She wiped her tears as she changed into an old t-shirt and lounge pants of Bettes She then crawls into bed, the same bed that she and Bette had once shared. She stares at the ceiling as her tears flow wondering where things had gone so wrong. How had they let things get to this place?

Thoughts begin to run through her mind, she cant seem to turn them off. So many memories. So many emotions. She remembers how happy she and Bette had been, when they first decided to try and have a baby. Then she remembers the frustration she started to feel when she couldnt seem to get pregnant. She remembers Dan Foxworthys comment. but very quickly a kind of symbiosis develops, it especially happens between two women who are doing the work of making a serious commitment to one another. And when that merging occurs, the intense, mutual dependency can be a deterrent to sexual intimacy. Is that what happened to her and Bette? Had they gotten so wrapped up in having a family that they lost the intimacy that kept them so closely bound together.

Her thoughts go back to Foxworthy. Why had she been so intent on going to him? She knew Bette had enough reservations about going to therapy to begin with. Why did she choose a male therapist? Did she intentionally want to make it more difficult for Bette? Was this one of her punishments to Bette?

She thinks back to Bettes video, the Jean Paul incident. She had gotten her hopes up so high only to have them crushed once again. Then to make matters worse, she took out her frustration on Bette. She remembers when Bette had come home early wanting to spend time with her. Bette smiled at her so lovingly, kissed her on the cheek and what did she do? She coldly walked away and went to the gym. She had seen the disappointment, the hurt in Bettes eyes. She knew the pain she had caused. Did it matter to her at the time? Not at all, she didnt give it a second thought. Now she looks back and sees that it was one of those missed opportunities that could have been used to bring them closer to each other. Bette had made the attempt. Why hadnt she met her half way? She remembers coming home to find Bette sleeping on her side of the bed. Even then, in Bettes own way she had tried to get closer to me and I didnt see it for what it was. How could I have been so blind?

She remembers the next day, when Bette came to their Foxworthy appointment, she was so proud, so happy. She had found a donor that she thought would be perfect. And what did I do? Still feeling frustrated over Jean Paul and annoyed that she had showed up late again, I coldly brushed it off. I remember snapping at her. Telling her that Id never met him. What the ***** difference did it make, whether I met him? Bette was so happy, she thought she had come through for me, for us. And instead of sharing in that happiness, I sucked it right out from under her. Why had I been so irritated with her? Why didnt I just take her in my arms and tell her how much I loved her? Why didnt I just thank her for what she had done for us? Then my reaction to Marcus Allenwood. At least that was one time that I can honestly say that I hadnt tried to intentionally inflict pain on Bette. Okay, well maybe I had been a little pissed that she had not told me that Marcus was black. It wasnt that I didnt want to use a black donor. It had just caught me off guard, with no time to prepare for my reaction. I suddenly became overwhelmed with all of these emotions I had never expected. After hearing Bette today, they were probably a lot of the same fears and insecurities that she was having. But I didnt do a very good job at conveying my feelings to Bette. We both ended up being hurt and confused. I wish now we had talked about it more. If we could have just gotten across to each other how we were feeling, maybe we wouldnt have drifted so far apart.

I knew she was hurting the day she left the house and told me to go out with the girls. I just didnt know how to reach her. Why couldnt we talk to each other anymore? When had we become such strangers? Later that night after Beck hit on us and she told me how much she just wanted to have a baby with me, I could feel her love. I hadnt felt it for awhile, but it was still there, strong as ever. When she came up with the idea of the three-way, I couldnt believe that she would agree to let someone else make love to me, just to give me the one thing that I had been longing for, a baby. I know how difficult that must have been for her. To put her feelings aside, just to make me happy. I was so lucky to have this incredible woman by my side. Then it was so sweet when she showed me her vulnerability and asked me if I had been turned on by him. I will never forget that night. I will never forget how she made me feel as she made love to me. She was so gentle, so tender, yet so passionate. It had been so long since we had shared such intimacy. We made love for hours that night. Reconnecting with each other. God how I had missed that, how I had so desperately been needing that. All the fears and confusion I had been feeling, went right out the window. They were replaced by the amazing love this woman made me feel. All I could think about was sharing a life with her, a family with her. I felt so much closer to her after that night.

I remember the morning when I told her I wanted us to try the insemination process again, at home, with Marcuss sperm. I couldnt believe her reaction. She was so happy. She even ended up getting to work late because she took the time to make love to me in the shower, right then, right there, showing me exactly how much she loved me and how happy my decision had made her. My body shivered at her intensity as she showed me the depth of her love. And later that night when we did the insemination, God how incredible she made me feel. Why couldnt things have stayed that way? We were so close again. We had gotten back on the same page with one another.

Things were going so well, that is until