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    Uncivil Union – (Chapter: Thelma and Louise)

    Story written on October 10, 2008 by goaskalice.
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    Genre(s): N/A
    Rating: N/A
    fanfiction(s):
    Character(s): N/A
    Number of Comments: 14
    Words: 2059
    Story Shortlink: https://assertive-maroon-jellyfish.104-250-143-187.cpanel.site/?p=19521
    Author Notes:

    Spencer and Ashley need therapy, but eventually have to work it out themselves.

    SPENCER:

     

    Have you ever waited for something so long that you felt as though it would consume you? Absolutely tear you apart, expose you for the anxious wreck that you are, ignore your frantic, beating heart and consume you? Have you ever had it happen thirty times in a row?

    One month.

    Four weeks.

    Thirty days of Ashley Davies.

    One month.

    Four weeks.

    Thirty days remaining of Ashley Davies.

    And then I was free.

    Absolutely free.

    I could go back to adequate feng shui and food grouped by nutritional content and perfect, priceless, necessary moments of absolute peace in which to blissfully clean my closet or organize my files.

    This is freedom, you guys. This is what I missed.

    “Spencer?”

    “I’m sorry, um…I guess I’d like her to clean the bathroom more.”

    “Ashley, are you hearing this?”

    “I’m listening,” she says, unenthusiastically.

    “Yes, Ashley. But are you hearing her? That’s what’s important. It’s the hearing.”

    “Ok, fine. I hear her or whatever. I get it. I’ll clean the bathroom, ok? With my tongue if that’s what she wants.”

    I considered the offer.

    “Spencer, is it safe to say that this isn’t just about the bathroom? Would you say that I’m right in assuming you’re merely using the bathroom as a symbol of what’s actually wrong here?”

    I thought about it.

    “No, I really just want her to clean the fucking bathroom.”

    “Here’s what I think,” Dr. Gallin said, scooting forward in his pretentious leather chair, “may I tell you what I think?”

    “That’s why we’re here, right?”

    Well, technically we were there because the judge made it a mandatory condition in granting our annulment, but whatever…

    “You see, I think that the bathroom is merely a symbol. It’s a battleground for everything that frustrates you about Ashley.”

    “A battleground?”

    “Ashley’s refusal to maintain the cleanliness of the bathroom represents her refusal to respect your wishes or her disregard to the order you find necessary in the enjoyment of your life,” he said, obviously proud of himself, “Ashley, what do you think?”

    “What do I think about what?”

    “What I just said…about the bathroom representing…”

    “I don’t agree at all. I mean, if you want I can sit here and nod and look pretty and act like I agree. But the truth is, I don’t. ‘Cause you know what? I think the bathroom represents something else for Spencer.”

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    Comments

    6. i’ve been reading this story from the beginning and i gotta say that this has been probably the most entertaining Spashley story i’ve ever come across on this site. brilliant. its smart, well-written, great humor, great storyline and plot. i find myself frequently checking for updates. addictive. great work, please keep ’em coming.

    7. okay so im about to watch the premire AGAIN i livre in cali so it came on at 6pm and now at 8:30pm but this was great i loved it pms please i think they are doing well geting better and everything :)

    8. I want more enough said na I’ll say more grew update and yea santas balls cracked me up I love the movie thelma and louise I think I’m going to go watch it now but I want more pms asap

    9. HAHAHAHAHA dude that was awesome! i can’t believe spence actually feels bad about hurting ash…. finally! progress! and yea santa’s balls, that was hysterical. seeing as how i just watched the premiere reading this has completed my night so thank you! please pms!

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