Spencer stops again. Ashley can practically see him playing it back in his head, trying to find the words. She’s thinking of how it must frustrate him so much that in this moment, he’s still unable to describe what happened not just in the moments themselves, but the hundreds of times the scenarios have replayed in his head, who knows how many times.

“Spencer ya don’t have to tell me anymore…I can see its hard for ya.” Ashley says sincerely with a caring smile.

Spencer finishes his Dr. Pepper, and crushes the can in his hand before answering.

“I wanna tell ya though…I wanna share important parts of my life in Ohio with the person who’s most important to me here in L.A.”

“Awww! Then, continue when you’re ready.” She smiles again.

“We finally dated, but it just wasn’t right. I still wasn’t ready to give it a real shot. However, that first time made me realize that I actually liked her. I realize I shoulda made sure of that before datin’ her, but like I said I wasn’t ready…Truth is I pretty much went out with her the first time to make her happy. My heart was in the right place from beginnin’ to end. I went out with her ‘cause its what she wanted, and I wanted to make her happy. I broke up with her ‘cause I was too mentally fucked up, and thought it would be better for her if I ended it before she had to deal with it. How could I expect her to understand when I don’t either?”

“I don’t know…sounds like an awful situation for both of ya.” Ashley answers trying to imagine herself in the situation. ”What happened the second time?” She asks.

“The second time was much better ‘cause I realized how great she was! I had finally found a girl who really liked me. She’s one of the only people outside my family; I could ever say that ‘bout…”

“Sounds good…Why’d it end? ‘Cause ya moved here?” The brunette asks searching for the answers in Spencer’s eyes.

“No…it ended ‘cause like so many other times in my life when things go well, my Bi Polar showed up to scrape open the scabbed wound it left behind the last time. It was like I wasn’t in control…I could hear myself sayin’ and thinkin’ things I’d never say if I was in my right mind, but I wasn’t…Imagine what it’d be like watchin’ as someone else fucks up your life, and not bein’ able to do anythin’ ‘bout it. Then, by the time ya realize you’re the one who did it…its too late…The end.” Spencer finishes.

“Awww! That’s so sad!” Ashley responds.

“Yeah I know its pathetic!” Spencer interjects feeling defeated.

“No…it’s sad ‘cause, ya deserve a happy endin’!” Ashley counters reminding him she thinks he’s a much better person than he realizes.

“Happy Endin’s only happen in fairytales and massage parlors!” He jokes causing them both to break out in a fit of laughter.

“That’s messed up Spence!”

After they’ve composed themselves Ashley looks at the TV screen, and realizes people are leaving the party.

“Damn! Parties over… we gotta go.” Ashley says wishing she could rewind the clock so they had more Spence and Ash time.

The End

Please wait patiently to see what’s next on The Odyssey Me!