So I got over it.  I told myself that everything was fine.  The next couple weeks though made it hard for me to just let everything go.  I found out that not only did she have sex with the girl in the bathroom, but she had also developed a crush on my best friend.  She had a crush on another girl; a girl she’d actually kissed at one of my games.  She also had a crush on a boy, although she wasn’t sure why.  And there was also the ever-present crush on Madison. Madison was Ashley’s best friend but wasn’t sure if she was gay, and therefore "nothing could ever happen between them." 

In a last attempt to make everything okay between me and Ashley, I asked her to go to an open mic night that week.  We hadn’t hung out together in a really long time, and I was hoping that it would help.  At the last minute though, she told me that she’d invited Aiden, the one boy she was attracted to.  Needless to say, I was a little confused, but I went with it.

The entire night, she made herself extremely distant like she often did.  She had told me once that she liked affectionate people, but whenever I was around her she closed herself off emotionally and made it almost impossible for me to be affectionate. 

The next day, I had completely given up.  I wrote her a long letter describing everything that had happened between us, and that I was caving in.  I told her how I felt about her, and I told her that as long as she still liked me, I was in. I was in it if she wanted me to be, and even if it meant that she would also like other people, I would still stick with her.

Her response to my letter was one that I had not expected at all.  She said that I was completely wrong, that she had never "hurt" me, and that she was a complicated and "fucked up" person and that as long as I was in her life, that my life would be complicated and fucked up, and that I’d have to deal with it.  I was also informed that I was "fucking turning into Kyla." I wasn’t allowed to tell her who she could and couldn’t like.