I didn’t realize how much Spencer really did hate me now until Glen and Clay’s funerals I went even though I tried to stay in the back ground Spencer’s shot fire through her eyes straight through my heart as she marched right up to me screaming and hitting me in the chest to get the hell out of here how I had no right to be their. She broke down on the grass and after she melted into me for a minute she looked up at me so calm with her eyes red from tears and just said “Ashley I hate you…just leave.” She almost whispered it. Those words still echo in my nightmares.

I miss her so much but that is the price when you give your heart to someone if they give it back it is always broken. The sad thing is I know I broke hers too. I tried to see Spencer a few times after that but of course her mother sucked up our break up and wouldn’t even let me on her property and since it was what Spencer wanted too I listened. The hardest part is I know Spencer hates me but I know apart of her will always love me…

I guess that is what I am left with the glory of love.

“Spencer how are you doing?” The shrink asked Spencer trying to break into the young girls thoughts. Spencer listened to the music in the background kind of laughing to herself.

I am a man who would fight for your honor
I’ll be the hero you’re dreaming of
We’ll live forever knowing together
That we did it all for the glory of love

That’s a joke she thinks to herself. Ashley always tried to protect me and yet she caused me more pain than anyone else in my life. I still think about her constantly she plagues my dreams in fact most of the time it’s her that dies not Glen or Clay. I wake up screaming, sweating and can’t get back to sleep. I see her trying she looks at me sometimes from across the quad as if she wants something from me but I could never give her anything like that after what she did.

“I’m ok…it’s been a long week.” Spencer sighs and prays to god this hour will be over quick.

“How is school.” The therapist has been counseling Spencer since her brothers died and she knows you have to start off slow and eventually Spencer will talk……or should she say she will hear everything Ashley did this week.

“It’s good I will be happy to get out of their though.” Spencer smiles today her thoughts were all over the place.

Spencer just rolls her eyes at the end as she turns to talk to her shrink. “It’s to bad that’s all we will have.” She whispers a look of pain crossing her face.