“I just can’t…..”

“How about this.” Like the perfect tension-breaking, cock-blocking genius she was, Angela Rizzoli reappeared in yet another ensemble, this one in a pink.

Maura seemed pleased with the distraction and was immediately back on her feet. She flitted over the outfit in silence, her head hung as she inspected it for quality and cut. Seemingly pleased with both, she hugged my mother briefly and paused as she passed me. “It’s not pink, it’s peach.” she whispered, squeezing my shoulder fiercely before she left the store.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Oh Ma.” She hugged me, careful not to cry onto my dress. “You look so beautiful.”

She ran her hands over herself and smiled coyly back at me. “She chose well.”

For the first time in her life, my mother had avoided prying into my life and asking the giant question that was on everyone’s lips. She hadn’t once asked where Maura was, if she would be in the wedding or anything. In fact, it was as if the name Maura Isles had been wiped from her vocabulary.

The tears slipped, unchecked, down my cheeks as she fussed around me, adjusting my hair here and there and generally being Ma.

“I always thought you two were dating.” she said suddenly. “I was so surprised when you told me about Casey.” My knees turned to jelly there and then and I sat heavily on the edge of the bed.

“You what?” I tried to be surprised but it just wasn’t there. Everyone at some point thought we were dating, hell, even I had to question it now and then!

“It would be OK if you were.” Her face had turned dark and serious as she settled on the window frame, her dark eyes fixing me in their gaze as they had so often when I was a child. “She’s a wonderful woman.” she continued sadly, “And she was perfect for you Jane.”

“Ma!” I choked on my tears and wiped angrily at my face, smearing mascara over my cheeks. “I’m not a lesbian.”

Angela hung her head and sniffed as she wrung a delicate handkerchief in her hands. “I didn’t say you were honey. I’m just saying you and Maura, you seemed to have….” she wiped her nose softly before meeting my eyes. “More.”