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    When you get it, do you still want it? Chptr 17

    TINA & BETTE

    Tina woke herself up from her dream, fear coursing through her body, her stomach in knots. Why did she have to be there? She didn’t belong in her…no, our dream! Her wonderful dream about Bette and little Mary. It was just like Bette had described it to her…just like the beautiful painting…until she showed up. Of all dreams, why did Candace have to be in this one?

    Tina snuggled down, trying to get even closer to Bette. They had fallen asleep on the couch, with Tina wrapped in Bette’s arms. She didn’t want to move. It had been forever since she and Bette had been so close, so intimate. Tina closed her eyes, trying to get back to the wonderful part of her dream, but every time she would start to feel the love coming from Bette’s gaze, Candace’s face would pop into her head.
    Tears slowly ran over the bridge of her nose, down her cheek and disappeared into Bette’s shirt.

    She laid there for a few minutes, trying desperately to memorize everything about being here, at this moment…Bette was on her back, Tina on her side, with her head resting on Bette’s chest. Tina felt the toes of her right foot resting on the side of Bette’s left foot…she felt her left leg, bent and snuggling between Bette’s legs…which meant that Bette’s left leg was in between Tina’s legs, and Bette’s hip was…*****…Tina was aching just thinking about where Bette’s hip was…as she mentally worked her way up her body, she realized that at some point during the night, her left hand had gravitated up and over and was gently holding Bette’s right breast…Oh God…it took all Tina’s will power to not circle Bette’s nipple with her finger…she started counting in between each of Bette’s breaths…one, two, th…then stopped and started echoing each of Bette’s heartbeats in her head…tha-dump…tha-dump…tha-dump…she felt Bette rustling her hair with each breath……the tears kept disappearing, making an ever bigger circle on Bette’s shirt.
    This was one of the most comforting and sad moments of her life. In the past, Tina had always felt so safe and loved in Bette’s arms, but Tina knew what direction she was going to go, even if so much of her heart was shouting to her that it was the wrong way.

    She fell back to sleep, wondering how she was going to tell Bette.

    Comments

    1. Please help Tina find a way to let go of Candace and rediscover Bette…Tina doesn’t have to destroy herself…if Tina truly doesn’t love Bette as she did then they need to part but you have shown the love is still going strong…help Tina, please!!!

    2. Aww…poor Tina, she is suffering soo much. What is Bette going to think when she wakes up and sees a puddle of Tina fears (yes fears not tears) on her shirt? Please don’t make her suffer too much longer, she deserves better, can Bette give her that? I’m not sure if I know anymore. I’m with Tinawho?…if she doesn’t love Bette the way she use, and it is hard to love her that especially with all those fears for the rest of her life…they need to part, Tina is too good of a woman.

    3. Like I said in a previous chapter, Bette looked at her wife of seven years and looked at Candace, and chose Candace. Can you imagine what Tina was going through for that SIX MONTHS that Bette was in an intimate relationship with someone else? That mean that if Tina hadn’t caught Bette, that affair would still be going. So I understand completely why Tina is still having those fears in her dreams. Having an affair and continuing that relationship…is something to me unforgivable, Steph is right, Tina is too special.

    4. Poor Tina. Not even in her dreams can she be happy. Another sad truth about life. Let her get on with her life if this is going to torture her so much. Perhaps, one day she will find true love again.

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