One by one, the girlsand Harrison, all followed Jeeves inside.  Peggy stood when she saw them piling in and raising her hand, said, “There’s no fucking bar!”

Jeeves: “Right.  This way ladies.”

Harrison coughed.

Jeeves turned and looking Harrison up and down, repeated, “Right.  This way ladies.” He continued up the staircase with the eager beaver club in tow.  The top of the staircase overlooked the huge foyer, and a chandelier filled with tear drop crystal accents hung low.  Of course, no story like this would be complete without the “clich O’” grandfather clock that stood just beneath the stairwell. The walls were paneled with dark Cherry wood and the rugssmelled of mildew. As they approached the top landing, Jeeves turned on his heels and stopped at the first door.    Pulling a card from his breast pocket he called out…

“Porter, McCutcheon and Pieszecki.”

He continued to walk down the hall as Bette, raising a finger, said, “Um, excuse me, Jeeves? You meant Porter and Kennardright?” Jeeves walked backwards until arriving at the door and looking down at the card, simply repeated, “Porter, McCutcheon and Pieszecki” before continuing on to the next room.

Bette: “Unbelievable!”

Tina:  “Oh, don’t worry, Bette, let’s just play along. (Whispering) I’ll sneak in later.”

Jeeves:  “No, you won’t! Schecter, Fairbanks, Doe and Kennard.”

Dana: “Doe?  Who the fuck is Doe?”

Everyone turned and looked at the shrugging Harrison and Jeeves rolled his eyes before making his way to the last room.

Jeeves: “Peabody!”

Peggy walked off toward her room, dramatically swiveling as she turned to face the group of jealous faces.

Peggy: “I called ahead!”

They flinched when Peggy’s door slammed shut, and turned to enter their rooms.  As Bette sadly watched Tina disappear into the doorway, she said, “Hey, Tina?”

Tina’s head peered out.

Bette: “I’ll miss you.”

Tina: “Aw, Bette, I’ll miss you more.”

Bette: “No you won’t.”

Tina: “Yes I will.”

Bette: “No you…”

Alice walked over and pulled Bette into the room.

Alice: “We’ll all be at dinner in a half hour.  Trust me, you’ll be fine.”

A half hour later

Everyone was standing in the hallway outside their bedrooms waiting.  They were all decked out in ballroom gowns from the roaring 20′s and Harrison was in a tux. They were busy complimenting each other as Jeeves began his way up the stairs to escort them down to the dining room. 

Jeeves:  “Ladies, are we ready for dinner?”

Harrison coughed.

Alice: “Uh, lets see, one, two, three, fou.we’re just waiting for one more.”

Bette walked over and grabbing Tina’s ass, shoved her tongue down her throat as Peggy’s door flew open.

(Cue Va va va Voom music)

A foot wearing the highest of high heels is our second prop to be introduced as Peggy’s leg kicked out, causing a gasp from the youngin’s standing before her.  The kick forced her dress to twirl up, which in turn, exposed a black satin garter belt high on her thigh.  Some would later say that’s where she kept her flask, but Peggy would go on to deny the accusation.  She wore a black ball gown that had been cut above the knee and shimmered when she shook. Her hair was done in finger waves and a pillbox hat had been secured on a jaunty angle.  She tied off her look with a huge Peacock feather sticking out of it, subtle but makes a point, she thought.  Nothing wrong with a little splash of color, after all.

Alice: “Whoa!”

To the dining room

As they entered the dining room they went right to the name cards on the place settings. They each started bumping into each other to read them as Bette, thinking she was clever, picked hers up and attempted to pull the old switcharoo next to Tina. Jeeves walked behind her and grabbing it, placed it back at the far end of the table. Harrison spotted his name and sat next to Tina as Bette snarled and shot off the look of death in his direction. They took their seats and as the idle chat began, the first course was served. They were drunk from the decadence as the servers walked around and dropped course two, and Alice stood to make a toast.

Alice:  “OK, Ok guys! First of all, I want to say that Peggy, you are hot sister! I mean, look out!  HOT! Ok, second, I just want to…”

At that exact moment, the lights cut out. The entire room fell silent as the sounds of struggle could be heard over deep gulping sound coming from Peggy.

Alice:  “Um, OKAY YOU GUYS, I THINK THIS IS IT.  This is fucking great!!”

Shane:  “Here we go”

Jenny: “This is really stupid”

Dana: “Oh my God, wow, well, raise of hands who’s still here, ha.”

Tina: “Babe?”

Bette: “I’m right here T. Don’t worry, I can see the outline of your breasts from where I’m sitting.  You’re fine.”

Peggy: “I can’t even see my fucking glass!”

They once again fell silent as the lights kicked on. Everyone was looking around the room as Alice became confused and said, “What the…What is going on? Why is Harrison on the floor? I didn’t know you guys were part of this!”

Dana: “This really is lame. Harrison?”

Bette got up and frowned.

Tina:  “What a rip off”

Bette:  “Harrison? If you don’t get up, I’m going to kick you!”

But, Harrison didn’t move. Everyone had slowly gotten up and formed a circle around his lifeless body!

Bette: “This is just ridiculous, I’m complaining.”

Bette went to walk out of the dining hall, but to her surprise, the french doors leading in, were now locked. Tina and Dana were smiling as they kneeled down over Harrison, and began to poke at his body. Their smiles quickly faded when Dana checked for a pulse.

Dana:  “Um, okay you guys, I’m not getting anythingTina!”

Tina: “Let me. Oh my God, Bette?”

Bette walked back over and put her hand in front of Harrison‘s nose.

Bette: “Oh my God, he’s not breathing!”

Alice: “Oh please. This is bullshit!”

Alice ran over and kicked Harrison in the leg with her heel.

Alice:  “Harrison? Harrison?”

Related