I am sitting in the waiting area of Gate B-7, my flight delayed by inclement weather up north. Having just finished the latest murder mystery by Tami Hoag (DARK HORSE), I decide to check with the agent about the severity of the storms ravaging the area of my destination. Im still a bit uncomfortable in my clothes not having brought a change of underwear to don after Ks and my sexcapade in Williams cab this morning. And I hope the agent doesnt think I am walking funny. The entire cabride episode left me feeling strange – not about what we did – no, I always love to notch another location on the ***** in Public Places list we have – but rather strange about how the whole incident evolved. Im usually the suggestor and aggressor in picking the times and places for these romps. I was pleasantly surprised by Ks genius idea, but couldnt fight this overriding feeling that she was just a bit too excited about #129 – almost like it was a going away gift because she seemed so eager to have me gone. That feeling and seeing her at the Delta ticket counter earlier is making me a bit paranoid – – – a residual effect of being an addict and liar. Maybe I will let her live long enough to ask her about all that when she calls later to update me on the FAN FIC stories.

Im worried about HER – nothing for days, longer than usual. Writer’s block I suspect – I hope that’s all. Ks new favorite is a bit more of a regular contributor so she will get some satisfaction tonight for sure. I will confess Ks ONE runs close second to mine – both SO good, like SO many of the authors. I miss them already.

I make my way to the agents counter where he informs me that the threat of lightning and tornadoes has subsided and the flight should be boarding within 20 minutes. He does add that there is still severe thunderstorm activity in the area, but flying safely will be no problem – a bit bumpy but safe for sure.

That news make me head to the concession area for a bottled water to down the three Dramamine I am about to take. With any luck I will be unconscious before we are actually in the air and any airsickness will be buried along with my concerns about K.

I no sooner swallow the stomach equalizers when I hear Delta Flight 716 non-stop service to Columbus now boarding Gate B-7 When I asked the agent about the weather in Ohio, I also told him of my motion sickness tendencies so he assigned me a seat on the aisle in the back of the plane near the restrooms. I was last on and in no hurry to board.

My stomach was beginning to feel a little queasy already and I wasnt sure if it was my concern for K or the anticipation of finally getting this little mission under way. Seeing my friends would be good for me, like K told the cabbie. I was hoping that with the help of the chemicals now invading my system I would be able to actually get a good, deep, restful sleep – something that eludes me night after night. Maybe I will dream and reminisce about some of our previous reunions and the marks we had targeted for our walls of fame. The Pat Sajak and Vanna White thing in 92 was a good one. They had taken WHEEL on the road and were in Myrtle Beach, Vannas old neck of the woods – and anytime we can combine a beach location with the mission is way cool for me. Catching the guys from COLD PLAY at that concert in Detroit last year was a double treat because we also got Gwenyth Paltrow – SAWEEET! But the ultimate classic accomplishment had to be the Clarence Thomas AND Bill Clinton thing in DC in 99 – that one took some extra planning but was definitely a keeper. Of course I cant imagine any of the missions thus far being quite as exciting for us as the Women of L – they rule in our private little bizarre world, and soon they will be OURS ! If we have all done our homework and research, this adventure should go down without a hitch and no one suspecting a thing. Planning and timing is crucial, so Biggie better be more than prepared.

I board the plane, take my seat, buckle up and ask the steward for a pillow and blanket as he sashays by. I tell him of my flying problem and he pats my hand in that understanding way those flaming queens have. He promises not to disturb me and will wake me when we land. I do hate to miss the take off because I am so mesmerized by the awesome power of the plane and its ability to lift its heavy load off the ground. I like watching the objects below become smaller as we rise higher in the air. But I am beginning to feel the effects of the Dramamine and I know I will be out in a few.

Im thinking about the girls and seeing them shortly. Biggie, aka Bigs, lifelong neighbor was the first friend I ever remember making. I think she knew she way ***** from the time she was in the womb, and after years of playing doctor with her, I was slowly accepting the fact that I was as well. I just think my closet door was shut a little tighter than hers. Shes a thin clone of that Misery woman, Kathy Bates, wears her hair short and spiky (that mullet thing in the 80s was SO not cool) and used to frost it. But now a little gray has sprouted and she likes the natural salt and pepper look. Shes smart, outspoken and the biggest gossip, in a good way, pretty much like the Alice character on The Show. If you need to know something about someone shes the one to ask even though you certainly wouldnt want to be like her ! She was part of the nerd group in school -intelligent but sassy and took no ***** when teased about being a *****, homo, whatever those mean words were in the late 70s early 80s. We were products of a Catholic school education (go figure!) grades k-8, then had to hit the public school scene for junior high (our citys schools went k-6, 7-9 10-12). Everyone we knew thought that we were girlfriends, but that would never happen. According to Bigs, if we became lovers we couldnt be friends. I couldnt risk losing her.

Junior high (grade 9 really) is where we hooked up with Betty Sue, aka BS aka Brown Sugar, aka Sug (pronounced Shoog). She was the only black girl in a school of 400 plus people, very pretty in an Angel Bassett sort of way, full figured and athletic. She was very popular, was a cheerleader, played volleyball and ran track, and knew damn well that her popularity was a by-product of dumb, redneck, southern Ohio curiosity. Her father was a doctor at the local VA facility so not only was she pretty and popular, she was rich as well for that neck of the world. When Bigs and I first entered junior high as 9th graders, most of the other students had already known each other and established friendships. The Catholic school girls were always targets of the malicious crowd and being ***** sure didnt help our acceptance much. Sug noticed how the other students teased us mercilessly from day one and was quite impressed with Bigs ability to hold her own and amazed at my indifference. My attitude was one of think want you want, I know whats right and true. Im sure Sug felt a lot of empathy for us – victims of discrimination — all of us — each in our own way – subtle or overt — victims nonetheless.

So one day in the lunchroom Sug joined me and Bigs, sitting down uninvited. She introduced herself and said that she thought we were *****, but that didnt matter because she thought we were cool. I said that she could think what she wanted, but I thought that she was right. We became instant friends, friends for life. The bond was forming and would grow stronger over the years — the nerd, the cheerleader and the freak — that would be me. Beachnut, aka Nutter aka Nuts, the quiet, funny one who could get the dope and the beer necessary for any get-together. Thats what the freaks were in my high school – the drug addicts ! Having an older sister who opted to go to the big city to attend Catholic high school, I made lots of big city friends who could get me anything I wanted so much easier than in the small town where I lived. So the three of us were actually quite popular in our own little ways — Bigs for her brains, Sug for her body and me for the buzz– and we actually managed to survive high school, barely,

The only trouble, if you can say it was trouble, with the trios dynamics was that Sug was not *****. Although she still claims that little 5-day fling with Bigs in 82 qualifies her, I must constantly remind her that SHES NOT! I knew from the beginning that their affair would be ill-fated and was terrified that the breakup would destroy the annual missions. Sugs insistence of having a three-way with a man was probably the final straw in a relationship that never should have developed in the first place. Bigs was not into ***** AT ALL, and the only three-way she would have with Sug would be with a high class hooker who could probably teach Sug a few new tricks. Thank god they broke it off in a February which gave them (and me as the long distance mediator) time repair emotions so we could get on with our real purposes in life. . . .

TBC