At the Planet…

“Hey guys are you sure you want to come with me on this assignment? Cause I have heard some wild stories from some of my friends about tours from this jail.”

“You have other friends besides us you mean?”
Alice glared at Shane.

“Hey just kidding Al…so yeah we’ll go, who knows we might find some cute ***** lesbos.”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea to start a relationship with one of these inmates Shane.”Bette stated.

“I didn’t say I wanted a relationship with one of these women. And who said anything about the inmates. I’m talking about the officers. Hot yeah? I know Dana is with me on this? Right Dana?Shane asked.
Dana glanced at Alice with a look of worry. But Alice was facing away from Dana.
< Why is she not looking over here. Probably looking out for Tina and Kit since they aren't here yet. I wish I can tell the gang that me and Alice are dating, but I don't want everyone to start acting all weird just because were dating. I don't think Alice is ready to tell everyone yet. I guess I'll just wait for her to bring it up. Oh...Shane's glaring at me...whats that about? Oh yeah she's still expecting an answer. Better say something.>” Umm…yeah totally.”

“Cool,” < I wonder if there's something going on between those two. Well if there is they'll tell us in time. Ohh Tina and Kit are finally here. Where the ***** were they. And why the ***** am I still talking to myself.> “Hey guys since Tina and Kit are finally here we can go now.”

“Its not are fault there was this slow ***** car in front of us the whole way here.”Kit said.
“Yeah,Yeah.”
And with that note everyone got up and left the planet. Each of them wondering what was going to happen on this tour.

Jail…Need I say More….

“Okay I’m officer Shakira Adams, and this is officer Emma Brooks. First off let me say that me and officer Brooks are totally capable of handling these people. Both men and women. Are there any questions before we start?”

“Uhh…yeah I have a couple.”
“Are you the reporter?”
“Yeah Alice nice to meet you.”
“So your questions?”
“So we will be seeing both the men and women sides of the jail?”
“Yes.”
“Okay are any of the inmates going to be out of there cells while were here, and what will we be expecting on this tour?”
“All of the inmates will be in their cells.Except I want to take one out to talk to you guys about how he got in here and what he misses on the outside, if its all right with you guys.”
“Yeah”everyone said.
“Alright… as for what to expect is they will try to scare you. Just remember your going home tonight the aren’t. They will suggest sexual acts with you. You might see them naked. The bars on the cells have wide enough spaces to where they can squeeze their arms through to grab you. Just stay as close to the wall as possible. They will throw things at you if you make them mad. They will throw their food, water, even their urine and *****. Alright if that’s it lets begin.”
They all started walking toward the cell block. All of the gang wondering….
WHAT THE ***** WERE WE THINKING!


At the Planet
8:00pm

“Oh my God what the ***** was I thinkin taking that assignment, and for one thing….what the ***** were you guys thinkin going with me to this….I mean its a jail with a whole bunch of bad, bad people.”

“Well hang on one minute… there was two new good things that happened today.”Shane said.

“Like what?”Alice replied.

“Well we all had/learned new experiences from this trip. And we all now know that you and Dana are dating…because of all the making out after the tour you guys did…actually I kinda new from the glazes of longing you two have been doing lately…it just takes everyone else a little longer to realize…cause their either blonde or really dense.”

“HEY!!”

“Sorry guys,but it is the truth…”

“Yeah it is…” everyone agreed.
“Hey guys, thats why shes Yoda.” Alice stated.

Everyone started to break out with laughter.

“Hey Kit what was it that, that guy said to you that made you blush so much?”

“Ohh I can tell you that one guys since I was right infront of her.”

“Don’t you dare Bette” Kit said as she went to put her hands over her sister’s mouth.

Everyone got up to push Kit’s hands away.

“Come on Bette while we have her.”
“You guys are some evil b-i-t-c-h-s.”
“Wow Kit, you know how to spell…well here’s what happened….”

*Flashback*

As they were walking through cell block d, the mens side, with all the hoots and hollers they were getting….one statement from a man stood out the most.

“Hey you in the back, with the flat butt, you come here I give you some lovin..”

“What my butt is perfectly fine, its just that, that…”

“Hey sis, just let it go.”

“Hey, hey, hey why don’t both of ya come in here with me get some of that sister love out in the open…what do ya say ladies..a nice threesome.”

“Boy I would not do you for three reasons…1 I’m a ***** ,and no you cant change me 2 that cute blonde up there is my girlfriend and 3 you look like one of those aliens from one of Sigourney Weaver’s movies.”Bette said.(anyone who seen her movies knows what i’m talkin bout)

*flashback over*

“Oh my god..did you really say that Bette?”

“Yep”
“Yeah she was just stickin up for me and herself.”
“Yeah man no one gets away from makin fun of my sister except me”
“Hey!”
“Just kiddin …you know I love ya sis.”
“I know.”
ON that statement they hugged.
“AWWW”
“Shutup” both Bette and Kit said.
“Well I got to roll see you all laterz”
“Bye Kit”
“Bye”
“Yeah me and Tina gotta go too, we’ll see you all later, hey Kit wait up, me and T can give you a ride home.”With that Kit, Tina and Bette left.

“Well guys I guess we should bounce too.” Shane said

“Yeah”

As they were walkin out Shane whispered something to Dana. All of a sudden Dana yelled out to Alice infront of her.

“Hey, hey you with the flat butt come here, I’ll give you some loving”

Alice not to happy with Dana for callin her that said…
“Don’t count on it” she said while walkin away.

“Man Shane you got me in trouble.”

“No I didn’t , you didn’t have to do the dare if you didn’t want to , so it is your fault. So just make it up to her. Plus ***** is really good after a fight…go get her tiger.”

“Perv.”

The end

*Authors note* Was it ***** guys?