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    Life and Love and Why – 18

    Story written on June 25, 2009 by tiff_duke.
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    Number of Comments: 42
    Words: 2512
    Story Shortlink: https://assertive-maroon-jellyfish.104-250-143-187.cpanel.site/?p=73705
    Author Notes:

    Whenever I let my guard down, whatever I was ignoring.

    "She didn’t take that well?" Tina guessed.

    "She made this laundry list of why I was wrong to bother to come see you." Bette nodded. "And she told me that I should take a long, hard look at what I really want."

    "And you said—?"

    "That I would." Bette sighed. "I didn’t want to lose her just because I wanted to be here for you, T. But if she’s going to make me make that choice, then that’s not the kind of woman I’d want to be with. She’s not the woman I’d like to have in my, or Angie’s, life. And I told her as much."

    "Bet that went well," Tina said dryly, then glanced up at her. "So the whole scene at The Planet…?"

    "I guess she thought she was what I really wanted."

    "And she’s not?" Oh, she’d missed that particular flutter in her heart whenever Bette opened up to her.

    "I want what’s best for my daughter."

    "You get to want things for yourself, too." Tina reminded softly.

    "So it’s lucky that it’s the same thing." Bette replied.

    Tina smiled at her, shaking her head. "Let’s head back."

    "That’s it?" Bette asked incredulously, holding out her hand to help Tina get to her feet from the boulder.

    "You know as well as I do we can’t have the relationship talk now," Tina pointed out. "I heard what you said, and I promise I won’t dismiss it."

    Bette glanced at her, giving her a look similar to one that Angelica gave when she was fully aware that she wasn’t being given something she wanted.

    Tina sighed, placing her hands on her hips and looking down at the ground. "It’s not your fault that we’re strangers to each other now."

    Their eyes met, and the pain in Tina’s eyes rendered Bette speechless, at a loss of what to say.

    "You were reacting the way any person would. But I wanted us to be friends, I did, for the same reasons you mentioned." Tina continued. "We were together for so long, we have our daughter… But it wasn’t enough for me to let myself feel that my heart was being ripped to shreds everytime I saw you. And it doesn’t help that I made that choice, that I made that bed that I had to lie on."

    "Tee–"

    "But I can only fight one battle at a time, Bette." Tina said softly. "Let’s deal with my family first, then we can figure out where we’ll go from here."

    Bette sighed.

    "I know that it’s not worth much right now, but when I tell you I’m glad you’re here… You’re the one I want — that I need — to be here. And I’m glad that you are." Tina told her.

    Bette took a deep breath. "One fight at a time."

    Tina nodded.

    "You won’t push me away?"

    Tina had to smile. "I know better than that."

    "So you and me… there’s gonna be a fight?"

    "Comes with the territory, doesn’t it?" Tina asked. "Getting back what you’ve lost."

    Bette smiled, returning to an earlier part of their conversation. "But I came back."

    "You did." Tina nodded, pulling Bette’s hand with her as they made their way back to the car.

    They didn’t say anything more, until they reached the car, where Bette tightened her hold on Tina’s hand, forcing the blonde to turn to her.

    "What?"

    "What changed?"

    "What?"

    "You said that you thought you’d grow old here. What changed?"

    Tina shrugged. "There was nothing here I wanted badly enough."

    "That’s why you left?"

    Tina looked at her meaningfully. "That’s why I stayed in LA."

    Bette couldn’t help it. A broad smile graced her lips, accepting the statement for everything that she thought, and hoped, it meant.

    tbc

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    Comments

    2. Yea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. jodi who? Thank God for the aliens, maybe they will come and get her. Thankfully they had that much of a talk to learn that they are on the same page. Loved it. Now they get to tackle Tina’s mother and sister. Then they can work on themselves. God, please let them go back together. They BELONG TO EACH OTHER.

    4. I love how you open their hearts to each other. The talks, yearning, and love is evident in their time spent together while in NC. They are not friends/family just because of Angelica but because they still love and need each other.

    9. Tiff, you are a master! This chapter was so beautifully crafted and so meaningful in understanding their relationship. That’s the true genius of your writing…being able to put into words the undeniable connection that these two people share. Can’t wait until you update again.

    10. Tiff, my favorite line is: “And I’m not asking for us to get back together, that’s like a million steps away, but I just wanted you to know that you will always have rights over me.” Does that mean you’ll be writing your beautiful stories for a long time? Heh! :) Love your writing…this chapter was sweet.

    16. I’d like to add WOOHOO that was the shortest breakup in writers history – no screen time (or wasted ink in this case) at all!! Happy Dance.

    17. Nice conversation…not much from Tina, but that one sentence, “…want….need…, …LA…” spoke volumes! A tad sadistic, but I’ll be so into their “fight”.Jodi, please play in that corner far far away.

    21. G_d, you’re good! Jodi, rest in peace, if you can. Ha! Tina and Bette, fight the good fight, and then make plans for growing old, together. Thanks!

    22. brilliant dialogue as always. what open and honest communication can achieve! oh and thank you for not wasting pages on the break up with jodie lol great chapter, tiff!

    23. this story really makes my heart swell and puts a smile on my face – even if it’s a heartbreaking smile sometimes – i really look forward to reading every chapter you put out (of this and all of your other stories). thank you for sharing your amazing stories with us. =)

    24. They just made a fair-sized leap with just a little communication. I can only imagine what they’ll accomplish when they *really* talk, or “fight”… Great job. Thanks, tiff.

    26. Thanks for the update. I love the way you get into their heads and let us know the motivation behind their words and actions.I’m so glad they’re starting to talk. It sounds like they have a long way to go but hopefully once Tina has had a chance to deal with her mother and sister the reconciliation with Bette will get more attention. I hope her family is open to reconciling with Tina. That rift has to be really hard to deal all these years….

    27. This is a needed talk. sooo honest and real. Thank you for giving them another chance. Tina needs support and loving from Bette. I am glade they are talking. Thank you for sharing this story with us. PPVS

    28. Whew! I’m glad the Bette in your story decided to break up with Jodie first, and off-screen (page) too, haha! This was a great talk between them, your dialogue has such a great rhythm to it. I loved many lines, including Bette saying Tina gave up her rights to all the “I told you sos” she earned – great turn of phrase. Thank you for this chapter!

    31. “I didn’t call you because I didn’t want to know what it would mean if you said no.” Tina confessed. And therein lies the distance that needs to be bridged. Great post – PPS.

    32. *Sigh* Your dialogue slays me every single time. Publish something would you?! I want to feel the pleasure of paying for something you wrote! Thank you!

    33. there’re so many things about this chapter that i enjoyed…the depth of the dialog, B&T opening up to each other, break up with Jodi (just perfect)…the hope and the million steps that are getting closer and closer…brilliant…thank you

    36. You have such a way with words. Sometimes something in your writing will strike me and I find myself reading a particular sentence over and over, in awe of the talent of the person who can create such beauty. Thanks for sharing with us.

    39. What an honest and revealing conversation set in the perfect outdoor backdrop. A moment of clarity in their relationship that took place in a clearing. In a clearing where they see vehicles and people come and go, the vastness of the world outside and what’s truly important and close to their hearts. Very nice, tiff_duke! I heart this chapter a lot. “We were together for so long, we have our daughter… But it wasn’t enough for me to let myself feel that my heart was being ripped to shreds everytime I saw you. And it doesn’t help that I made that choice, that I made that bed that I had to lie on.” => Very poignant… Your dialogue is as impeccable as ever. Not much fireworks but boy oh boy, the emotional undercurrents are quite powerful. Thank you so much for this post and for sharing this story, tiff_duke! Cheers! :>

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