Later that night–Lara’s Apartment

“I just don’t know what else to do anymore.” Dana wept as she sat on Lara’s unusually comfortable sofa. After all they had been through, she was truly grateful that she could consider Lara a friend. True, there was still an undeniable attraction that the two women shared, but Dana was thankful to have a friend outside of “the family”. Especially finding herself in the situation she was presently in, she didn’t really feel comfortable talking about this to Shane or Tina, or even Bette.

One reason was that she didn’t want to put them in the middle of all the shit that she was going through with Alice. It was bad enough that they were often present when the writer would have one of her “fits” and accuse Dana of cheating on her, or just being with her out of pity. Dana positively despised attention, despite her career of choice, and it seemed that although Alice knew that, she disregarded it when it came to airing out her relationship grievances in public places. Dana would recognize the uncomfortable looks on her friends’ faces after Alice would have an outburst, and she didn’t want to further that uncomfortability by seeking their advice about it.

The other reason she didn’t feel like she could go to her closest friends with any of this was because she wasn’t entirely convinced that it wouldn’t get back to Alice somehow. It wasn’t like Dana didn’t trust her friends with her secrets. She, out of anyone in the group, could confidently attest that when these women promised to keep things within the group, they meant it. And part of the reason Dana was able to stay in the closet for so long was because of that discretion. However, it didn’t mean that just because they could keep things within the group, that they would necessarily keep things from each other. Dana feared that if she were to tell Tina that she was contemplating a breakup with Alice, Tina would, in passing, mention it to Bette. And what if Bette wasn’t thinking and relayed it to Kit, and some customer in The Planet overheard the “gossip” and somehow, through the tangled web of connectivity that is the West Hollywood Lesbian Community, Alice found out. It would completely destroy them both. Dana knew that she was most likely being paranoid and probably way too cautious, but still…this was a life-altering decision. She was terrified that somehow, someway, Alice would be told, by someone other than herself, that her best friend and the woman she loved had had enough. And Dana couldn’t take that chance, even if it was miniscule.