Tina hasnt seen Bette for four weeks. This is a fact she has been trying to ignore for a awhile now. Tina hopes her honesty wasnt too much for Bette, who was sensitive. Tina knew that but wanted her point to get through Bettes head. Tina thinks this; she thinks this while checking her mail in the kitchen. Thinking too how warm Bettes neck is how Tina would rest her forearm on it to warm the rest of her body. Tina is thinking how sadness seems to follow her every where these days. She thinks this until something catches her eye. A letter. Tina squints closerno return address.and Bettes handwriting. Adrenaline spread so fast spots cover Tinas eyesshe sitsshe stares.thinking whether to rip it apart or.rip it open. Tina rips it open.and reads and ***** re-readsand wipes the sweat from her brow.

            T,

            These past four weeks havent been easy my darling, sometimes it felt like detox sometimes my head hurt, hurt, and ***** hurt. For a long time after we talked I felt angry. Ive never been confronted like that before. You are like a shadow that attached itself to mine, cant get rid of it really dont want to get rid of it. Flew all the way to New York on business and your still on my mind. Finally walking down some long dirty street sitting at a dirty diner Im ready to articulate in this letter things Ive tried not to think about. This is what you wanted my darling, and believe me this is not bullshit to bet you back. Its like youve unlocked some things in me and even now in New York theyre still here. People im around with here say shes alright, shes good, but my brain is like a festering sore. Guess you were right T. but before I do my little confessional take a seat and drink some water, Im drinking some along with fluffy pancakes that are gonna stick to my gut. At least Ill be full for the evening. Ha-ha, I miss our breakfasts my darling. But enough of that now, been doing a lot of thinking you know, a lot of reflecting. Been up my ***** in work but I always find time for you, always will. Well here goes everything.