Tina was awake long after Helena fell asleep. She leaned up on her elbow, silently watching the other woman slumber. It was amazing how, in such a short time, Helena had become so intrinsic to her life. In fact, she was the most consistent part of Tina’s days. Alice and Shane tried so hard to be supportive, and Tina was grateful for their caring, especially in the first weeks after Angelica’s death, when they had mobilized to make all of the necessary arrangements. But her interactions with them were burdened by so much shared history. And seeing them always made Bette’s absence even more difficult for her. She had to force herself from asking how Bette was and what was happening with the sale of the house. And she had to stop short of being honest with how she felt without Bette in her life. How betrayed and abandoned and angry she was. It had created a tense dynamic, and she often ended up feeling more depleted than comforted when she spent time with them.
With Helena, though, Tina could be honest about everything. What she was thinking and feeling. How she was doing. Helena even seemed to understand that sometimes, Bette and Angelica were the last things in the world that Tina wanted to focus on. And in those times, it was perfectly fine to talk about whatever pedestrian or banal topic came to mind, and not feel guilty. She was free to be however she was without risk of judgment or need of explanation. And that was a huge gift.
Grief was a strange thing. At times, fierce and all-consuming and ever present, and then, in certain unexpected moments, it was dormant, as if in hibernation. It was never far away, and Tina came to think of it like a predator, always lurking and waiting. But there were brief spans of quiet. When she could breathe deeply without feeling as if the weight of a boulder rested on her chest. And when she could sleep without anguished dreams, or tormented thoughts. They weren’t plentiful yet, those simple times of ease. Yet Ronnie assured her that as weeks and months went by, Tina would notice them increasing.
Helena‘s eyes fluttered open, and she reached for Tina in the semi-darkness, holding her in a sleepy embrace. “How long have you been awake?”
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(21 votes, average: 4.81 out of 5)
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love it.
Great as always, but please get Bette.. lol Please post soon
Thank you for humanizing Helena. Love the story.
Great update but please please bring Bette into this so they can talk through there pain
I’m trying to get past Tina needing Helena…but it’s hard. I wish that Bette was not so emotionally and physically withdrawn. Great chapter.
It’s wonderful that both are benefitting from the friendship…yay. It’s so lovely…but I must join in the rampant curiosity of what’s going to happen on Bette’s end… wink, wink… ;)
If Helena was like your character in S2, Tina would not have gone back to Bette, IMO. Great job!
Examining the impact on someones life when they experience something so tragic is such a difficult thing to do but you are doing it so well FFC. Thank you for taking us on this touching journey.
i wish bette would consider going and seeing tina, but then i’m scared of what she would think about helena being there…but i just need my B&T dose…great story
Although I’m not especially looking forward to getting B and T back together, I would love Bette’s perspective on this situation…I love how Helena is interacting with Tina.
I’m not sure how Bette can even be brought into this. This is something they needed to go through together, and Bette up and leaves. Tina is getting stronger, because of Helena. Again Helena is there for her, when Bette isn’t.
Where the FUCK is bette!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
These last two chapters are brilliant, and I truly love that Helena is such a hero. Thanks again for this beautifully written fic.
They don’t have to explain their relationship to anybody. They’re helping each other, and that’s all that matters. Good job, ffc!
Thanks FFC seems like the healing has begun. I like this Helena, I don’t want to see her romantically involved with Tina but I really like her. Your characters are always full bodied.
Im always in wonderment at how alike yet different Bette and Helena can be, loving this story :) gotta agree with fortlw thanks for showing Helena’s human side :)
Good chapter!
juz so great…! :)
Such a beautiful story Love the direction you are taking us and will ride this tide of joy