Shane woke up and stretched a little. She felt Laras arms around her body and turned around. They were sitting in the sofa, Lara had fallen asleep while she was rocking Shane to sleep. Shane put her arms around Lara and crawled closer to her, she wanted to be as close to Lara as she could. Lara kept sleeping and Shane closed her eyes too, feeling really safe in the arms of her love.

Lara woke up about an hour later. She stretched a little and wondered where she was before she remembered the night before. She tightened her grip around Shanes body and kissed the top of her head. Shane woke up and locked eyes with Lara.

Im sorry that I woke you up. Lara whispered to her.

You didnt. Shane answered. I was already awake.

Lara smiled at her and kissed her head again. Are you okay? Lara was anxious.

Shane sighed and sat up. Yea. Its just..

You dont wanna talk about it? Lara finished her sentence.

I dont know if I can. Shane looked at Lara. I dont know if youd understand.

Try me. Lara looked serious. I want to help you Shane, but the only way to do that is if you talk to me!

Okay, okay. Shane sighed and rose. I was at my moms.

Lara kept looking at Shane, who sat down again. When I was little, my mom used drugs. In almost every memory I have my moms either high or passed out. So when I was twelve I left home. Shane stared at the floor.

Where did you sleep? Lara asked in a tiny voice.

At some girl I picked up. If I hadnt found a girl I just slept on the streets. I really hated my mom. She tried to contact me later, but I refused to meet her. I just couldnt stand to be near her again. I didnt want to re-live my childhood. Shane said without taking her eyes off the floor. But yesterday I went to my moms.

How was she? Lara asked.

She was. Um. She was dead. Shane said and rose again.

Lara wanted to smack herself for asking that question.

Shes been dead for two years. Shane continued. And I didnt even know about it. She wandered around in Laras living room. I got a call from my brother. He told me that he had been looking for mom for a year, and that he had found out that she was dead. I didnt believe him, so I had to see for myself. Shane was almost in tears. Damn, I hated her, but she was my mom, and I never gave her a second chance! I didnt think she could change. And I just. I dont even know if anyone were there for her funeral or if anyone was there to say goodbye.
Shane banged her fist in the wall. I dont even know how she died. Was she in pain? Did she have someone to hold her when she fell asleep? There are just so many ***** questions that I cant find any answers to!

Lara rose and walked up to Shane. She embraced her and let Shane cry to her shoulder. Lara made a shushing sound and rocked her back and forth. I dont wanna end up like she did. Shane said through the tears.

You wont. Lara comforted her. Ill be here. No matter what, Ill be here to take care of you.