Spencer could feel tears burn the back of her eye lids as she shut her eyes tightly. It was so hard to listen to Ashley say all these things. It was so hard to sit there and have this decision to make. Could she let Ashley in again, just like that? Was it wise to let the pounding of her heart at hearing those heartfelt words dictate her actions. She needed to slow things down before she drowned in it all.

“Ashley, I don’t think you know what those words mean to me, hearing you say that makes me feel so… I don’t even know how to describe it. I think I’m deliriously happy and scared beyond belief at the same time. I still care so much about you, I can’t lie and say that I don’t, but I don’t know if I’m ready for us now. I need you to give me time, give us time to get to know each other again. I think I can at least say that I want you in my life again, I don’t want you to just disappear again. Can we just be friends for a little while, can you just give me some room to let this all settle inside of me?”

Ashley was the one sitting quietly watching the ocean now. She wanted so badly to just grab Spencer and kiss her senseless, to just make her feel everything good that lay between them again. Only a few hours ago she had been following that root, brazenly telling Spencer she was going to win her over and then basically trying to feel her up in the back of Kyla’s SUV. That was the easy way of doing this, but she realized it might not be the smartest thing in the long run. This was not the time to let the old, stupidly impulsive Ashley come out to play. That Ashley had never thought things through, take her impulsive idea to jump into bed with Aiden for example. Everyone knew how well that had worked out for her. So she bravely pushed her hormones aside and turned to Spencer. She took Spencer’s face between her hands and kissed her softly on the lips. It lasted but a second, yet still managed to convey so much. It showed her trust, her dedication and the conviction she had in their love. Spencer felt the tears finally fall from her helpless eyes.

“I’ll take your friendship, Spencer. Even if that is the only thing you can ever give me, I will gladly take it, but know that I will always hope for more. You’re my heart Spencer and I can’t let you go again, so if and when you are ready, I’ll be there. I’ll always be there, I promise you that.”

Spencer gratefully excepted the hug Ashley offered when she finished. Spencer could not speak, could not think, could not do anything but hold Ashley close to her heart for just a few more moments.

“It’s so good to have my best friend back.”