Chapter One: Punishment

It’s been 4 months, since Madison died.  Of course I still think about her often.  I try desperately not to, but every time I see a brunette walking by, I immediately think its Madison.  That maybe they really didn’t kill her and just warned her to stay away from me.  But unfortunately, my mind always took me back to her cold body every time I have a little hope.

As for my current lifestyle, I’m still high on drugs most of the time.  I switched from cocaine to heroine because I needed something stronger to get me out of bed every day.  Every since that dreadful day, I’ve felt so lost and heroine was the only thing that helped me cope with everything.  During this time, I started ‘dating’ Dion, the leader of our family.  You’re probably thinking what the hell Spencer, you’re gay!  And you’re right, I am gay but sometimes things don’t work out the way we want them to.  I had to survive and Dion made it a lot easier for me, along with the constant drugs he fed me.  I was a true junkie.  My father would have been so proud.

Even though I had Skye, and by default Dion, I was alone in this world.  I had no family, no friends, and I lost the love of my life.  I was stuck with no place to go, no place to feel safe and secure.  A blonde, blue eyed girl was not safe living on the streets of New York, so the family was all I had.  Even after everything they did to me when they found out I wanted to leave, I stayed.  Like I said, I was stuck.  Stuck in life my mother threw me into by hating who I was.  I too started hating myself, hating the life I created for myself.

You’re probably wondering what the consequences of my wanting to leave were.  There’s really no easy way to start that tale but here goes.  Dion locked me in the basement of the house without food and water for 2 days.  At least I think it was 2 days, I blacked out often during the whole ordeal.   Now that wasn’t the worse part of my punishment, and believe me when I say I wish it was.  I was tortured and raped by at least 20 of the male members of the family.  I couldn’t do anything to stop them.  Dion had tied me down on the bed with my hands above my head tied to the headboard and my legs spread out wide with my feet tied to the footboard.  I was completely naked and helpless.