Ashley: Is it a crime to give your girlfrie…(I stumble through the word) a ride home?

Spencer: (looks at me, I could tell something bothered her.) Um, Ash. 

Ashley: So..not to interrupt I just wanted to tell you that you’re great and I think maybe we should go slow with this. I guess what I’m tryin to say is I consider you close to a girlfriend relationship…

(I could tell I might have said something wrong…she pressed her brow down toward her eyes and looked like she was confused.)

Spencer: Ok. So you wouldn’t call me your girlfriend even though we kissed and I met your sister? Just ….”Close”

(Oh no…)

Ashley: Ok ok. That sounded kinda bad. I just don’t want us to rush into anything. I feel alot for you Spence. More than I have in along time. You just don’t understand the stuff you have to go through before we can be in a open relationship.

Spencer: Ok. So I don’t understand now? I’m trying. I know I’m not out or anything. I haven’t yet proclaimed to the world that I like girls and I don’t care, but don’t tell me I don’t understand. I’ve thought about it since I first thought I liked you. My Mom would go nuts if she knew, you don’t think I have thought that through?

(oh boy. She’s definitely mad.)

Ashley: Spence. I’m sorry. I didn’t know your Mom would be that crazy if she knew. You don’t have to tell her now or anytime soon. It’s only when you are ready and sure about it. Spence, I didn’t mean to make you upset. 

(things finally started to cool down…)

Spencer: You don’t think I’ve heard what they say about you Ash?

Ashley: I don’t care what they say, and you shouldn’t either. 

(I might have sounded a little defensive)

Spencer: I don’t. I just…I 

Ashley: You must, or else you wouldn’t have brought it up in the first place?

Spencer: Ashley! I don’t want to get hurt. This whole thing is kinda a big deal…Kissing you was kinda a big deal to me and you play it off like we aren’t even at a relationship we are just “Close” I’m sorry, but it really feels like a situation where you could just say there is no commitment. 

Ashley: I’ve never been good with commitment Spence…

(Long pause…oh great.)

Spencer: Well then you shouldn’t start anything with me until you are “good with commitment” (she gets out and slams the car door. God why do I always have to mess things up? This is a great way to get rid of one of the best things I have right now…well had.)