“What the fuck are you talking about, Spencer? Noticed what? Huh? What?!” I feel this need corner her. To push her into the wall. To throw her into the spotlight. To make her smaller than me. To make her scared. By using my voice. My tone. My eyes. My hate.

“How you look at her. How you long for her. How you keep wishing every time you enter me that it was her lying underneath you. Panting against you. Squirming under you. Moaning in your ear. You don’t think I see it? It’s written all across your face. All across YOU. And you don’t even have the dignity to let me go first.”

She’s raising her voice. Blaming me. Accusing me. It’s not the first time. It’s not the only time. She’s turning this thing around. Trying to focus the light on me. Trying to break free from the unexisting glares.

“Don’t even try to turn this thing against me, Spencer. Just shut the fuck up. You know that’s all bullshit. I’ve told you before and I’m telling you for the last time. I have never, ever, in my whole life loved anyone the way I’ve loved you. I’ve never wanted anyone as much as I wanted you. Until this. Until now." I pause. Shifting slighly. Continuing.

"Danielle is nothing. She’s never even been a THING. Never. It’s not my fault that you’re jealous, Spencer. I haven’t done anything. You’re the one who done this. You’re the one who created this mess between us. This gap. Because of your insecurities. I’ve done everything in my way to stop you from feeling like this. Everything. But what do you do? You go off screwing some pathetic dude as soon as I turn my back away from you for a split second. For what, Spencer? For what?! Don’t come here and talk to me about dignity.” I’m burning. I’m lashing out.

“You’ve done everything you could? Is this what you call everything you could? If you did everything you could you wouldn’t have found me like this.” Her scornful voice fills the emptiness. Fills the hatred. Ignites a fire I don’t know how to put out. I don’t know how to stop.