Prologue

Spencer’s POV

Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurt you so much that you wanted to cry and made you even like yourself less? Did you ever feel like no matter how hard you tried to get the person to notice you or like you that it winds up backfiring in the end? Does it seem like the closer you get to admitting you have feelings for that person, something or someone comes out of the blue and prevents you from doing so? You can call me a coward for not telling her how I truly feel about her, but it was so obvious to me and the outside world that she didn’t return my feelings. She considered me as her other sister, nothing more, nothing less. Unfortunately, nothing about her lack of feelings for me was to change anytime soon. I tried making her jealous by hanging around with other girls who have shown a romantic interest in me and flirting with them from time to time. She didn’t really care since eighty percent of the time she had some girl’s tongue down her throat. So the fairy tale where she became jealous and told me her real feelings for me were crushed and the plan went down the gutter. Sometimes I think she knows the way I feel about her, or maybe it’s just wishful thinking on my part. I’ve seen the sparkle in her beautiful brown eyes when she’s around a girl she’s interested in. The sparkle is never there when she looks at me. Maybe it’ll never be there. I’m just the girl she turns to when she needs help or someone to console her. It was like the time she asked me to tutor her when she was close to failing her Algebra II class. I was the shoulder she cried on when she was dumped by some foolish girl. This happy occurrence happens a lot. She went for the same type of girls that I tried to warn her about who would wind up breaking her heart, but she claimed that she could take care of herself. I was fighting a losing battle. I’ve tried to find someone to replace her, but I’ve failed at doing so. It’s hard to try to be with someone else when all you see is her face hear her voice, and smell her. I’ve always been able to do anything I set my mind to, except get over her. But, then again, I think that’s because I really don’t want to get over her. As I sit in my room contemplating my next move or non-move toward my love interest, the doorbell rang. I went downstairs to answer the door and my guess on who was it on the other side of the door, her. I could always sense when she was around, almost like I could sense her essence, as creepy as it sounded. I opened the door and I was right about it being her. I noticed her tearstained face. Her eyes were red from crying and her cheeks were puffy. She clung onto me and I automatically wrapped my arms around her waist. I heard her softly sobbing and she buried her head into my shoulder. I kissed the top of her head. "You were right," she began with a sob. I had an idea that her very fickle heart was shattered like it was a million pieces of broken glass, yet again. Why couldn’t she see that I wouldn’t ever break her heart? Why couldn’t she see me? I was right in front of her. Why is it we don’t see the one thing we clearly need right in front of our faces? She had to know that I didn’t intend to ever hurt her. "She was exactly like the other girls. I am such an idiot, Spencer." "No, you’re not," I responded reassuringly. "Any girl who would set you free is the idiot not you." Her brown eyes looked deeply into my blue eyes. It was like she was searching for something. I don’t know what that something was though. If I did, I would help her out. I didn’t know what came over me and I gently pressed my lips against Ashley’s moist lips. To my surprise, she kissed me back hard by crushing her lips against mine with a passion I couldn’t believe she felt for me. I didn’t care though. The kiss lasted for several minutes getting more passionate and heated by the passing second until Ashley was the one who pulled away from the kiss. Ashley had a terrified look on her face, which made me worried even more. Was it the fact that I kissed her or the fact she kissed back? I’ve seen the look on her face before. She was going to run away. Good job, Spencer. Try damage control with the girl. It may not work, but it was worth a shot, right? Alright, I’m going to have stop with these conversations in my head. "I’m sorry," I began with a sigh. "I…I… I take it…back… the kiss I mean." Ashley gave me an unconvinced look. Yep, she knew that I was lying. "You can’t take back a kiss," sighed a flushed Ashley. "It’s a done deal. It’s not like you can return a birthday present if you hate it. I… I have to go. I don’t need to talk anymore about my relationship drama. I… I’ll see you in school, okay?" Ashley tried to leave my house, but I grabbed her by the arm. I attempted to prevent Ashley from leaving so there wouldn’t be any awkwardness from the kiss. Whether she wanted to or not, we would have to talk about the kiss sooner rather than later. She angrily pushed me to the ground and left my house. I sighed in exasperation knowing it was not exactly the ending I was hoping for.