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    Los Angeles Is No Place For Lovers – (Chapter: One- Tiny Vessels)

    I love this city but hate it at the same time. It is so very superficial, with it’s Hollywood Blvd. and designer stores. The tourists flock in with their camera’s, snapping photos of those garish bronze stars imbedded in the sidewalk. So what if some actors hands were once pressed there? What makes them so special that by just touching something they have improved it? I can remember a song I heard once a long time ago. It said something like, “In a town this shallow, you can’t possible swim. You will most certainly drown tomorrow.”

    Maybe that was what was happening, because  as I pull up to the curb to drop her off at the club I had picked her up at only two hours earlier, I most certainly have the sensation of drowning. It is like that moment when you are swimming up for air in a pool, but the surface is further away than you expect. You get that jolt of adrenaline, and your once graceful and fluid movements become panicked until your face breaks the surface of the water and you gasp for air.

    Once I arrive at my home I decide I need to get rid of this car. Those leather seats are permanently tainted now, and I won’t be able to sit on them ever again. This isn’t the first time this has happened, and I am considering setting up a used car sales business for all of my ‘tainted’ vehicles. Good thing daddies money provides for plenty of new cars, it is just a shame that not even a Rolls Royce could make me happy.

    I make it inside and into the shower before I break down crying. This is the way it always goes, I convince myself to go out and meet someone new, I try to fuck them, I freak out, then I come back home and cry. I’d never imagined one person could make my life such a living hell, but she managed to, without even trying.

    I believe it has been nearly one year since we last spoke. They say time heals all wounds, but I think “they” have never been with Spencer Carlin. She is the kind of girl love songs are written about, the kind of girl heroes risk their lives to save in story books, the kind of girl who with just a smile could make your heart perform tricks you’d never thought physically possible. I wish there was a way you could make someone love you, make them abandon all their fears and apprehensions and force them to just listen to their heart. If I could have made her do that, I probably wouldn’t be in this shower with it’s scalding water cascading down upon me and my face buried in the ceramic tiles lining the wall.

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    Comments

    1. wow….that was just wow….i would love to know what happened between the two of them because it seems they are both miserable…..this was so angsty and sad, but i freaking love it…can’t wait to read more…pms

    2. BRAVO! Your writing never ceases to amaze me. Words are your canvas, and you, my friend, paint them with an elegant grace that only gifted writers possess. Favorite lines: There is no sensible thought, after you have been left by Spencer Carlin, only a foggy daze that leaves you stunned and confused. Your life becomes like watching the television on mute, with the pictures and the mouths moving, but nothing seeming to come together and make sense. Please continue with this storyline…it’s awesome!

    3. wow….that was just wow….i would love to know what happened between the two of them because it seems they are both miserable…..this was so angsty and sad, but i freaking love it…can’t wait to read more…pms

    4. BRAVO! Your writing never ceases to amaze me. Words are your canvas, and you, my friend, paint them with an elegant grace that only gifted writers possess. Favorite lines: There is no sensible thought, after you have been left by Spencer Carlin, only a foggy daze that leaves you stunned and confused. Your life becomes like watching the television on mute, with the pictures and the mouths moving, but nothing seeming to come together and make sense. Please continue with this storyline…it’s awesome!

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