You’d think after a hundred years you’d be prepared for this, Edward.

I shoot Alice a half-hearted glare, because it’s all I can manage right now.  I am positively vibrating with nervousness.  Somehow, perhaps because of the guests seated in white chairs on our lawn, Alice resists the impulse to stick her tongue out at me. She giggles to see me so rattled. I hear the word poised bouncing around in her mind, but I tune it out.  I’m certain she’s only trying to calm me down, but today there wasn’t even much that Jasper could do for me.  How can anyone convince me that I deserve this day?  When Bella is so perfect, and I’m … well, I’m still trying to see myself as she sees me.

Jasper did attempt, though.  He insisted on playing his twelve-string, and now he sits behind me on our wide front steps, dapper in his dark gray suit.  He lounges casually, the curve of the guitar’s body resting on his right thigh, as if this is just another August day, as if his playing for us is nothing special.  He plays well, of course, and Alice’s golden eyes watch his slender fingers like she’s memorizing the movements. 

Emmett stands next to me, huge and smiling, his hands clasped demurely in front of him.  He has memorized what he jokingly calls his “sermon,” and I’m more than a little fearful of what may actually come out of that irreverent mouth of his. But Bella said she trusted him, and she wouldn’t have anyone else conduct the service but our own newly licensed Reverend Emmett.

I look at the pale and beautiful faces of my family and, for the hundredth time today, I’m thankful that it’s overcast so we don’t have to do this inside.  Bella deserves just exactly this.

Esme and Carlisle sit hand-in-hand next to Alice and a subdued Rosalie, right in front of me, on the groom’s side. 

Groom.

The word causes another tremor to wobble its way into my chest and I swallow out of habit.  I focus on the other guests.

Renée and Phil sit on the other side of the aisle.  Bella’s friends are behind them … all except one. Jacob’s absence, I admit, was a relief to me.  I want all her attention today.  Perhaps he knew that. Perhaps he’s letting me have it.