Bettes Office…..

Bette: [tugging at her dress slacks] SHIT! Did I gain 20 pounds over night!?

James: [knocking on her door] Hey, are you ready!?

Bette: Uh yeah! Just a sec—–SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! [she yells in frustration]

James: What’s going on!?

Bette: The button on my pants just popped off and bounced off my forehead!

James: I warned you not to eat those last two M&M’s!

Bette: And I warned you about getting back together with Peter Pan!

James: Pam! For the last time her name is Pam! Why do you call her Peter Pan anyway!?

Bette: [now sitting down squeezes her foot into one of her high heels] Because she Neverlands.

James: [in a sarcastic tone] Cute, real cute.

Bette: [proudly smiling] Thanks, I’d thought you’d like that one.

James: Now, hurry up I can’t stall for much longer I don’t think Mr. Zao likes me!

Bette: James, you’re over exaggerating!

James: No, I’m not!

Bette: [standing in front of the mirror behind her couch gives herself one last glance over] Well, then how do you know?

James: Because he looked me in the face and said, “I don’t like you.”

Bette: [walking towards the door]

James: [through clinched teeth] Bette!

Bette: [finally opening the door] Well, how do I look?

James: [sequencing up his nose in disgust] Like, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.

Bette: Your mother. [she says walking past him]

James: [slightly running cuts in front of her forcing her to stop]

Bette: James, what are you doing!? I’m already late!

James: I wouldn’t be a friend [he says before leaning over and removing something from her hair] if I’d allow you to go out there with two gummi bears stuck in this lion mane you call hair now would I!

Bette: Am I good to go?

James: [sighs] It’ll do.

Bette: Here goes nothing. [she says before walking off then disappearing around the corner]

James: Good luck. [he says before returning back to his desk]

Bette: Mr. Zao, my apologies sorry to keep you waiting.

Mr. Zao: Mrs. Porter, finally you grant me an audience if I didn’t know any better I could easily assume you forgotten about our scheduled visit today.

Bette: Not at all, Mr. Zao I received a last-minute phone call from potential art buyers in London and it ran slightly over, again sorry for the delay. [she says lying through her teeth]

Kits House…..

It was two minutes shy of noon and like three mafia rejects Kit, Tina, and Tasha all sat at her dining room table in silence. Correction they didn’t sit in complete silence the sound of clanking utensils scrapping against plates, chopping jaws, heavy breathing, sneezing, and slurping noises echoed throughout the room. Tasha shocked the hell out of Tina when she called apologizing for the inconvenience but hoped she could pick her up from the airport. It was extremely late when her flight landed and The Los Angeles International Airport wasn’t exactly located in the best of neighborhoods, not wanting to chance it she passed on calling an Uber and called her instead. Putting her issues with Bette aside temporally she and Kit both hopped in Kits car to pick her up. Pulling up to the curb they both somberly looked at each other in response to her body language, Tasha looked emotionally defeated. Getting into the car she thanked them both offering Kit gas money (that she offensively refused) and asked to be dropped off at a hotel. After hearing an earful from them both she reluctantly agreed to stay at Kits in the other guest bedroom for the night. Neither Tina, Tasha, nor Kit was able to sleep comfortably. Tina and Tasha couldn’t sleep for obvious reasons and Kit remained worried about the current state of her friends turbulent lives. After making breakfast for her guests Kit takes a seat at the table.

Kit: [taking a sip of her coffee looks at Tasha who refused to look up from her plate]

Tina: [noticing it as well shoots Kit a sorrowful look]

Kit: [hoped to break the ice] Overthinking, depression, and loneliness well looks like the gangs all here!

Tina: [smirks]

Tasha: [poked around at the pancake on her plate]

Kit: How’s the food Tash?

Tasha: [speaking barely above a whisper] Uh, its good thank you.

Kit: I can’t tell you’ve been pushing that pancake around your plate for the past ten minutes.

Tasha: [finally cutting it shoves a piece into her mouth] It’s good, really.

Kit: Now that’s more like——[she cuts herself off as she prepared herself for another series of sneezes] Ah-choo!!! Ah-choo!!! Ah-choooooooooooo!!!

Tina: Bless you.

Kit: [frustrated wipes her nose] Thank you, my allergies are killing me! They keep driving me crazy like I won’t pop 5 Benadryl and end us both!

New Port News, VA…..

Tasha: [with her hands tucked into her front pockets walks into the gym] It was 15 minutes past 7:00 p.m. leaning against the side rail of the bleachers she looks at the score board. The score was 21 to 14, the team was down seven points with two minutes left in the first quarter leaving plenty of time for them to close in on the lead. In the closing minutes she watched as both teams exchanged back to back buckets she couldn’t contain her excitement seeing Anne knocked down a 3 pointer bringing the team within two points. Hoping to come up with a defensive strategy they call a time out. Due, to the break in the game she uses the time to find a seat and does so at the far end of the court.

Anne: [in the huddle] Don’t count us out yet we’re still in this!

Teammate #2: Hell yeah!!!

Jessie: How did you get opened like that?

Anne: [trying to catch her breath] Easy, I told her I’d lick her if she touched me.

Jessie: [giving her a high-five] Nice!

Teammate #1: Ewwwww, cooties I would’ve stepped back too!

Anne: Don’t worry, I wouldn’t put my mouth nowhere near your body!

Teammate #1: What about slapping my ass? [she playfully sticks out her butt]

Anne: Too skinny, slapping your ass will sound like a screenshot!

Jessie: [although she was annoyed with their bickering her last response forced her to smile] Why don’t you two do America a favor get it over with and just sleep together!?

Teammate #1: Hey, Jess some words of wisdom for you never hold your farts in they travel up your spine into your brain and that’s where shitty ideas come from, get my drift!?

Jessie: [rolls her eyes at her]

Teammate #2: After the game you two can argue, fight, and slap each other’s assess all you want but right now we need to focus on winning this—–.

Teammate #1: [cutting her off] Well, I’ll be damned! [she says before jogging away from the huddle] The rest of the team seeing what grabbed her attention quickly follows behind her]

Anne: [excitedly] Tash, you made it!

Tasha: [smiling] I wouldn’t have missed it for the world!

Los Angeles International Airport (LAX)…..

Shaking harder than a Shakira video Bette nervously awaited for Tina’s arrival. Since her departure communication between them had been minimal to say the least. Although, she had been gone for a few days for Bette it felt like a lifetime. During their fight regrettably she said things she wish she could take back, but like her father used to say you can’t take back a bullet once it’s been fired from a gun. It took every ounce of self-control not to discuss the matter over the phone, but deep down she knew it was a discussion that needed to occur face-to-face. The night of the sleepover she should have been nominated for an Oscar for how well she reacted to Tinas, “We need to talk” text. We need to talk, a.k.a “Oh shit I’ve gone and fucked up now!” Those four words had the power to make you remember every single bad thing you ever did in your life. Considering they were already fighting she was left to assume the worse internally she was a nervous wreck.

In anticipation for her arrival she took the day off and cleaned the house from top to bottom, bought the ingredients to make her favorite meal, and most importantly made sure the wine was fully stocked as she was certain they both would need plenty of it. As thoughts continued to race wildly in her mind she was somewhat relieved for the distraction taking place a few seats in front of her. With their backs turned a couple appeared to be auditioning for the porno version of the movie “Good Will Hunting” Good Will Dry-Humping. Touching, grabbing, kissing, moaning, and the dirty talk appeared to be all indications they were picking up where ever they left off. Many people disgusted by their display of affection shook their head in shame or simply got up and looked for another seat elsewhere. As she continued to stare she couldn’t help but smile, whoever they were reminded her of she and Tina when they first met. She was the gravy and Tina was the biscuit she slopped her down every chance she could get! Completely caught up in the free peep show before her she was oblivious to the young TSA guy standing in front of her.

Los Angeles, CA….. (Department of Motor Vehicles)

Bette: [looking inside stops before the main entrance then turns around] Forget it, let’s just come back another time.

Shane: [grabbing her shoulders turning her back around] Oh, no you don’t! Look we’re already here let’s just get it over with and be done with it.

Bette: [tilts her head back sighing in frustration] Fine.

Shane: [smiling] That a girl.

Bette: [reluctantly walks through the main entrance sequencing up her nose in disgust] It looks like Walmart and American Horror Story threw up [covering her nose] and why does it always smell like dragon breath in here?

Shane: Like what?

Bette: You know when your breath smells like you licked the asshole of a dead skunk for several hundred years….[pouting] ughhhhh I hate coming here! [she says before standing in line]

Shane: I hate coming here to but maybe this time it won’t be that bad.

Customer Service Lady: [looking over a customers paper work] Sir, may I see your expired drivers license please?

The Man: [frantically pats down his pockets] I can’t seem to find my wallet!

Customer Service Lady: So, you’re saying you don’t have a license?

The Man: No, I have a license! I just had my wallet I remember grabbing it before I left home I don’t know maybe I lost it! [he says in a panic tone]

Customer Service Lady: [shaking her head] Sounds like you have a real problem sir, see this paperwork you filled out is for people who already have a license.

The Man: It took me a week, three smoke breaks, and canceling dates on both my girlfriend and my wife on the side to fill out that paperwork!

Customer Service Lady: And since you don’t have one——[she says before throwing his papers in the trash bin next to her desk]

The Man: [staring in disbelief] Hey!!!!

Customer Service Lady: [reaching underneath her desk pulls out a new stack of papers placing them on her desk] This is the paperwork for people who need to replace their license! [she says handing it to him]

The Man: [taking them from her looks at her like she’d lost her mind] Are you serious!? This looks like the damn yellow pages! What am I supposed to do with this!?